My Arris Hurts

[nailit]

Don't quiet know how a telephone conversation would go with a GP when complaining about a pain in the ****
It might be piles.
But how the hell can a telephone conversation determine that?

My *** hurts while defecating
Ive already had a colonoscopy where pre-cancerous bits were cut out and another where internal piles were injected.
My *** hurts
What the hell Am I supposed to do?
I need it looking into...literally!

[bobbinwales]

Can doctor do a zoom/whatsapp call with your webcam?

[Mamyalynne]

If you can get a telephone consultation explain that you have a recurrence of a previous problem and are experiencing pain in your rectum when you open your bowels.

[Mamyalynne]

Bobbin, it would be a struggle to get a webcam up the rectum.

[MallyJ]

Just tell hime/her the problem...where it hurts, what sort of pain, how often or all the time and mention the previous history of your bum. I really don't think there is anything adoctor will not have heard already. Hopefully it well get sorted before it gets bad...good luck with your bum xx

[TrevorThePug]

FaceTime? Just make sure you are in a private space and the camera light is on. Despite what your mother said, that is not where the sun shines.

GPs deal with worse conversations than that, just tell it how it is.

[nailit]

//Bobbin, it would be a struggle to get a webcam up the rectum.//

LOL,
Its a serious problem (it hurts when I deficate)
But God, youve got to laugh.
The bloody worlds gone mad.

[ubasses]

Phone GP, you will probably have a phone consultation to triage you. If he thinks he needs to examine you they are now seeing patients and you will get another appointment.
At least you will have your back to him/her.!!!

[Mamyalynne]

I know, the thought that pointing a camera at your anus would enable a doctor to see within is a bit comic.

In your situation I would get a Hemorrhoid cream with applicator and apply that for a few days.

[Tilly2]

Anusol or Germaloids ointment might help to relieve some of the pain. Try them.

[lady-janine]

Sorry for your pain but had a little giggle at the thought of trying to fit one of those enormous zoom lenses used for photographing wild life. (titter)

Sorry. Hope you get some relief soon.

[nailit]

Its a pain in the butt...pun intended.
But got no hope of it getting looked into...no pun intended

[Sqad]

Its either piles or a fissure in ano.
Neither are a big deal.
Good suggestions re. topical applications.

[Arksided]

Have you tried not speaking through it :-)

[Barsel]

You are on top form today Arky.:-)

[nailit]

//Have you tried not speaking through it//

And the wag of the day award goes to....

(Its a welcome change from Douglas...)
;-)

[Ellipsis]

> Bobbin, it would be a struggle to get a webcam up the rectum.

Or a bobbin, for that matter, but I bet it's been done. I heard a story about a lightbulb once ...

[nailit]

OK, Lets get the bum jokes out of the way...
Piles, fissure, tear, or something else?
It bloody hurts having a carp!
And I cant get to see a doctor...

[Mamyalynne]

Oh yes the A&E left luggage dept has a catalogue of those entries ;-)

[Ellipsis]

I would ring the doc and get an appointment. You should be able to if it can't be sorted over the phone. Just crack on ...

[Mamyalynne]

It hurts awfully nailit, I know - try the topical route whilst you are waiting for an appointment of whatever sort - that is exactly what I would do.