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Do you think im in the wrong?

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PinkFizz | 15:53 Sat 17th Jun 2006 | Body & Soul
56 Answers

Lastnight I went to a nightclub with my b/f to see a group playing and had a great time.About 2am we were starving and went into a takeaway place opposite to grab a bite to eat.It was packed,and as my b/f tried to order at the counter he accidentally knocked a guy who happened to be very drunk and built like a house!! This guy turned round and raised his fist to my guy,my b/f did the same so me,being an idiot,jumped inbetween them.But that made things worse,instead of the other guy calming down he started spitting into my face to fuck off,with all his little hangers on telling me I didnt know who i was messing with.B/F behind me was just watching the whole thing.I was so mad that I told this guy he couldnt talk to me like that - and he hit me and I fell flat on my back.After a min or two I was lifted up and sat on a chair,offered water etc and the guy was thrown out.Meanwhile b/f went up to counter,proceeded to get his food and we walked back to where we were staying,upon entering the room he went mad at me and said I should have left him to sort it and I could have got stabbed or something.I got upset and said I was trying to help but he just said I asked for what I had got and then went to bed,leaving me crying my eyes out.Today he has woken up and not mentioned it!!


Was I wrong in what I did and do I mention it again?

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your boyfriend watched you get clocked and didn't do anything? Afraid if he was mine he'd now be my ex!


And then to say you asked for what you got? I'd be hard pressed not to snot him one!

Question Author

Yep.B/f was very drunk,although he didnt appear it,and I'd had a drink which made me a bit confident but I wasnt drunk at all.I just cant believe he didnt thump the other guy,or comfort me or anything.At the mo he is asleep on sofa,after spending all morning throwing up.Im just still in shock - I would have bet my last pound that he would have defended me to the hilt,whether I should have intervened or not.


Sorry pinkfizz but I agreed with BOO - I can't believe that that after you were belted your b/f went and ordered his takeaway ! I'd be livid with him - he's let you down BIG STYLE when after all you were only trying to protect him. Hope you're feeling ok today tho pinkfizz after your thumping - aren't there some b******s around !! Doll xx

But oddly enough, Mr Boo just raid your post over my shoulder and sort of agreed with your boyfriend!!!


His reasoning being is that you shouldn't have got involved, and he said perhaps you wern't hit (he reckons if a massive bloke hit a woman, you wouldnt get up off the floor?) Maybe you were pushed out of the way???


Would you like me to sneeze on his tea for you?

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I've been in this situation too - interfered in a potential ruck and then been shouted at by bloke. At the end of the day he feels that his male pride has been dented and that he was stopped from playing his role as protector by a girl. Plus, it sounds like all you did was make the situation worse which could have resulted in you both getting hurt - I can see where he's coming from on this. I'm NOT saying that you deserved to get hurt, but what did you think would happen?? That a drunk guy would have some sort of morals and wouldn't lash out at a girl?? That's not the way it happens I'm afraid.

OMG Pink!!!! Are you ok? How frightening!!!!


I can see in a way where he was coming from, this bloke could have had a knife and the whole situation could have been much much worse. BUT from the sounds of it your boyf was going to do the same as you and to me this smells of male pride being dented. Man protect woman etc.. So would it have been right for him to have had a go even though he said himself the guy could have had a knife?

I would discuss this calmly with him, he needs to understand he can't say things like that (I think I remember you saying something before about him upsetting you but then acting like it hadn't happend? To do with work? Sorry if I am mixed up) then act the next day like nothing has happened. This just leads to things being dwelled on and nothing resolved.
He upset you badly, not to mention you must have been badly shaken up and hurting, he should have been comforting you not shouting at you. I think you need to have it out with him and tell him how upset you are.

I think you were wrong in standing up to this guy but only 'cos I like you and would hate for you to get hurt :o)
Also don't agree with fighting.

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Question Author
The big guy who was a nasty piece of work with a shaved head,had a clenched fist and whacked me in the chest,as you say,not enought to knock me out,but he still hit me.I stayed on floor for a min or two,not coz I had hit my head or anything,but because I was in shock and could hear the staff throwing the guy out.When I got up,later in room my b/f said I was being dramatic staying on floor to get attention! I just keep walking into lounge looking at him sleeping and I cant look at him the same now.

Did he ever apologise for telling you to f*** off the other morning just for asking him what was wrong?


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Well, I don't think your intervening would have done much for your boyfriend's self esteem, particularly if he felt he had the situation in hand, but standing by as you get walloped and then ordering food seems incredible to me. I'd dump him!!

It's a pity they didn't call the police and lock the pratt up!


Your bound to feel like that for now Pink, he has let you down badly not being there for you when you needed it. He felt bad because he didn't protect you and unfortunatley took it out on you. Let the dust settle a little, or at least let the vomit subside before you have it out with him :o)
Brushing it under the carpet isn't going to help anyone.


You ( in my opinion) were wrong.
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your boyfy should have took his hiding [caused by you] then lost hisa rag with you,or he should have chucked you out the way first then took his hiding .
your interfering is the worst thing and frankly id be furious myself cos there is nothing worse than trouble and you have to worry about the missus. but your wimp of a boyfy letting that happen and not doing anything about it has no reason to be angry cos his crime was the worse of the two


bin him the puff

Nice one, Ward!


Pink..I am rather concerned about your b/fs behaviour (with regards to your other post) he seems to have serious issues..


He really needs to get out whatever it is in his system ~ only in a much more effective way.


And yes, that loser should have been locked up for the night and charged with assault.

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I agree that I shouldnt have intefered,but I didnt want the 2 guys to have a huge punch up which I could see happening.And I think that my b/f should have told this guy to sod off as soon as he started on me.But what hurts the most is that he carrie on gettin his food ,and hasnt even mentioned it tolday at all!


WM -sounds like a pretty good offer!

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No Suzy - he didnt apologise the other day.I finally txt him hours later and asked if he was in a better mood and he replied - a bit - that was it!
Regardless of whether you were right to intervene he doesn't seem to be acting in a considerate manner towards you nor to be willing to discuss his behaviour once he has calmed down which doesn't seem to be a healthy sign.

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