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calling all married couples

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lynneylou | 15:06 Thu 12th Oct 2006 | Body & Soul
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After 10 years of marriage, im 36 my hubby's 41, I dont feel attracted to my hubby anymore and thought of sex does nothing for me at all. Is this normal, are we just stuck in a rut or is it my age and hormones????
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do you go out on dates and enjoy each others company still? or is married life the same day in and day out? Its hard keeping that special little spark when things are always the same.
Perhaps you are in a rut and need to something different. A change of scenery if money permiting. Even a short weekend away, just the two of you. Something romantic. Worth a try.
Oh no I didnt mean to make you worry about it. :-(
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don't go out much really but when we do, even if its for a weekend, as soon as you get home the moaning and lack of conversation begins again. i don't enjoy his company because he moans and questions over everything which drags me down.
Have you tried talking this through with your hubby? He may be feeling the same and it's a shame to let 10 years of marriage go out the window because neither of you spoke up. As for the sex, if you don't feel attracted to your hubby, then it's little wonder that you don't feel like doing the horizontal shuffle. Think about what attracted you to him in the first place, what has changed? If it's just the monotony of married life, why not do something together like joining a few local clubs, or finding a new mutual interest. The main thing is not to get stuck in the house watching the tv and ending up resenting each other's choice of programs.
Is the moaning and questioning specific, targeted at you or just 'old f@art' syndrome?
HEY, many couples don't notice till its too late, so yeah-find ways to rekindle that spark-even a newly married couple can feel this way-it's how u live and routine!!-plays a big role, a good serious talk and a bit of effort should do the trick. at the end of the day-love is only the start of your attraction, if u don't keep at it the flame dies,.. so work on it and u'll be back on cloud 9 soon.
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There's nothing like nagging and moaning to drag you down, my first wife was North of Ireland Champion and to be honest in the end I'd just like to have stuck a sledghammer in her face, so I do sympathise, however I think for the most part, grand dragons aside, it's just that after a while people do get stuck in a rut.
My second wife and I have been together nearly ten years and although we are both very busy people and sometimes don't see a huge amount of each other we always make an effort to do special things together, go places, see people, try new and different things.
We've both got a very high sex drive which is good as we are evenly matched, but again I think the key is to never let it go stale and to just try to keep the romance and spark alive, and have fun.
To stave off problems we set aside a nagging hour each week where we can fully vent our frustrations without the other one getting upset, and nagging is banned at all other times. We then also tell each other how much we appreciate the nice things the other has done all week, so it always ends on a positive note.
Well not wanting to be to blunt. May be you are not ideally sorted. I have been lucky enough to find my soul mate and perfect partner. Good luck. Be happy .Cy Marven

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