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should i go for it

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bambibooboo | 21:01 Fri 01st Dec 2006 | Body & Soul
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been talking on phone regularly ie. hours virtually everyday {to someone i met online} for just over two years now, we both joke about meeting and i trust him but not sure if it would ruin friendship if we met,
any thoughts??
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It seems you have two options. Either take the chance and meet or dont meet and have huge phone bills for the rest of your days. I'd go for it if I was you.
Let us know how you get on .. meet in a public place and stay there ... good luck.
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it's usually him that calls me, don't wanna' lose friendship tho' and get feeling i'd fall in love with him if we met and we'd end up sleeping together with me being hurt cos' don't think he wants anything serious
2 years is a long time to be chatting so emotionally you are way more involved than you would be normally. I think its different for us girlies, he will probably just see it as a first date and then if he doesnt want to see you again or you dont want to see him then you could get hurt.
Only do it if you are sure you dont want anything out of it.
So you think you might fall in love with him if you meet him.

You also think that he dosen't want anything serious

Why do you think that your end up sleeping together if he dosen't want a serious relationship?

Why does he ALWAYS ring you but not vice versa?

Question Author
thanx goodsoulette think that answer is spot on

i do want something out of it deep down i'd be meeting him on assumption we were gonna be a couple setting myself up for heartbreak. He says he has feelings for me and i think he does cos' he's always been there when ive been down and lonely, and me for him. However think you're right when u say he has less of an emotional attachment. than me, wanna' take chance but have feeling reality can't be as sweet
Can I suggest that you just don't sleep with him then?
the sex wont make any difference. Just meeting him will make the difference. How close do you guys live?
Goodsoulette,

Why won't the sex make any diffrence then?
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laurence i have rung him before but its him that rings for hours, who rings who isnt really the issue here.

don't think he wants anything serious cos he says so he has since the first conversation we had as he's very wrapped up in his career.
think we'd end up sleeping with each other cos' in past few months the sexual tension is intense and we fancy each other like mad! well i do him anyway lol and he says he does me
so in a nutshell, he wants a shag then he'll move on.
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milly yeh guess u have a point but what im saying is i feel so close to him that it would be a natural progression.

dont mean straightaway at starbucks or anything, but think it would be in a matter of few meetings
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yeh guess laurence god men all after one thing huh

thanx for insightful advice guys
ure right shouldnt meet him he blatantly just wants quick shag then thats it, won't waste my time anymore

gosh feel relieved now

just needed u to point out blindingly obvious, so easy to be taken in on phone, well at least ive avoided getting hurt for real
thank u all xxx
The fact of the matter here is, hes extremely busy career wise, he dosen't seem to want a serious relationship, yet he will drop his strides if theres a chance of getting his leg over.
Please don't take this as offensive, but i,ve seen this type of man all to often, actually my brother whos 42 now has been doing this type of thing all his life, ie internet, no commitment, career {busy} and yet he will clearly tell you that a lot of women are gullable to this type of thing, he basically brac's about it.

i'm not saying for one moment that your this type of women, all i'm saying is be careful
bambi,

No bloke is going to ring you constantly for two years just to get a shag,then forget you, two years of chat, at quite an expense,I really can't see that, have a meeting and see how you get on, you don't have to have sex, do you. you might not get on when you meet or you might fall for each other, if you don't meet you will never know, live your life with no regrets, Ray
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laurence hang on a minute

he isnt overly keen on meeting like me he thinks it may spoil the friendship

infact he has put offmeeting more than me and only recently have we seriously considered meeting
he isnt busy career wise he's at a point where he's not working and has taken time out for stress but the career he's taken time out of is a very stressful one, he thinks he should get that sorted out before he considers a serious realtionship
bambi,

But you posted that hes very wrapped up in his career.{look at your 1st post to me}

Now your saying he ain't got a career, or he has but hes taking time out for stress?

I can only answer to what your posting.
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laurence he has a career he is preoccupied in but not currently employed in, a profession he has taken time out of he is wrapped up in it in the sense he wants to go back to it but unsure about whether he should hence the stress and wrapped up bit.

the job issue isnt really important what im trying to get across (badly) is that if he'd have wanted to meet me earlier on in phone friendship he could have ive just gone along with him not being bothered about meeting cos i like his company, its only recently that he's expressed serious thoughts about meeting up, which is the dilemma

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ps laurence can understand why u came to the conclusion u did cos im not putting across what i want to say very well, think the sex bit is my hangup, i know for sure he's not after quick sex if indeed any sex at all, i posted thing thanking you for advice he's obviously after sex blah de blah cos realised thats how id made it sound.

i have issues trusting men and have warped view that they are all after sex hence me being single

ok, its a clearer picture now.

How concerned are you about his ''stress''.

or was it a thing that just happened at a given time and hes now over it.

I'm only thinging long term for you

Sorry if you think i'm being a little intrusive

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