Pointing out ex's

[I-say]

If you have been with your b/f for over a year, and he still talks about women he had sex with in the past, or points out to you women he had been with (even though they never acknowledged him) What would you say he is playing at?

[crete]

he sounds quite immature, is he aware you find his behaviour a problem ?

[ummmm]

Twonk is my new favourite word

[bloaterbum]

get rid of the knob he obviously likes his past better

[joko]

do it back to him!!!


point out random blokes and say you have had them, and tell him bedroom stories about your exes - he'll soon stop!.

I had a boyfriend once who would constantly comment on girls in the street, such as nice legs, eyes, hair etc and then look to me for confirmation...now i am the first to appreciate something nice about someone else, but it began to irritate me because i couldn't figure out why he felt the need to keep doing it - i got suspicious of his motives - what was his game?

i thought perhaps he was trying to see if i would get jealous, but not in a bad way, he was trying to see if i was cool and grounded and free-spirited enough not to let a mere comment upset me - i don't think he wanted me to get jealous, just to know i wasn't a bunny boiler or irrational...

i would always agree with him and the commenting didn't offend me - but i did start to do the same thing - and surprise surprise he didn't like it and stopped!

[I-say]

Didnt expect so many responses.

Daisy and ummmm, you are spot on. He tries to make me jealous, all the time, then when I do get jealous, he says I am insecure!

I dont make him feel insecure in any way, as I love him.

And no jno, he 39 believe it or not (me also)

For all who replied. I thank you very much. Oh, and I have spoken to him about this, but he just says I am too jealous.

No win situation :(

[Octavius]

39 years old and still doing this????

Good grief, you need to get rid and find yourself a decent grown up man.

He really is a twonk.

[ummmm]

He'll keep chipping away I-say....Be careful and be aware!!!

[jno]

39??? Phew. More to the point is the business of him telling you you are insecure; it sounds very much as though he is projecting his own behaviour on to you (which we all do sometimes). This is pretty manipulative. Some people like this sort of thing, but if you don't, then as before, I'd tell him to stop it, and see what happens. If he doesn't, telling you you're oversensitive or something, then up to you what you do. The reason I asked his age was that, with young males, you can sometimes gently point out that their behaviour is immature and you'd like it if they kept it to themselves. At 39, I don't really see this happening; but it's worth a try, if you want to hang on to him.

[I-say]

Didnt expect any more replies. ummmm, he has chipped away at my self confidence from doing all his "bragging"

jno, I have on several occassions told him how this upsets me, and sometimes have even tried to ignore his comments. But it ends up in an arguement, where he completely ignores me, ignores my texts and phone calls, until I apologise!

I made excuses, thinking it was because his marriage ended badly. But there are only so many excuses you can make for someone is'nt there?

We had an argument last week, and he has completely ignored any contact from me. So I think its time like you said Octavius to get rid of him. But as he has ignored me, maybe he beat me to it!

Thanks all xxxxxxx