one sexual partner

[cuddlycat]

How does it affect a man to only have had one sexual partner? My friend has recently got married and even though she hasn't had many sexual partners before, she's the only person her husband has ever slept with. He's done many other things with many other women but never got as far as full on sex. Now he seams to be constantly having a go at her for no apparent reason and I'm wondering if this can be some sort of subconscious panic at the realisation that there is a good possibility she'll be his only one. They'd been together for a couple of years before getting married, are both in their mid twenties and love each other very much and I don't think he'd like the idea of having to cheat on her and therefore finds himself in a bit of a catch 22 situation. She can't really approach the subject with him because we only have a strong feeling that is the problem but don't know it for a fact. Can anyone shed any light on the situation or know where we can find some answers?

[Morrisonker]

maybe he has cheated on her? You never know. I'm not really in any position to give advice from experience (18 and in my first serious relationship) but it sounds pretty likely that he does feel a twing of regret. I love my boyfriend with all my heart, and I can imagine settling down with him, but I would like more experience with other people before. If it actually is a friend (and not you ;) ) then I'd leave it up to them. She might ask you for advice, butit's only causing harm to have so many theories running around in her head without having any proved. I suppose the way I'd handle it is by being frank. Straight out ask him if he has any regrets (maybe best doing this when a *little* tipsy) and let him know that she won't be offended, as it's completely understandable. As romantic as the idea is, only having one lover in a lifetime seems terribley unrealistic to me, which is sad really.

[Greedyfly]

It is scary though my partner is 'the one' im sure but he is 8 yrs older than me and has had a few sexual partners where as he is my only one. And even though I will marry him one day - that curiosity is drilling at me on a regular basis. Its scary!

[incitatus]

The problem could be anything. To be honest, the number of partners doesnt make a difference to me. Mrsinci, though younger than me, has been around the block more than I have because I am a scientist and we dont get laid much. But I dont care. the reason I dont care is that we have a loving relationship and we are both satisfied with our sex lives. And i think that is the point. if this chap feels that he isnt the best she has had (and it only takes one brief mention to make him think that, men being very fragile in the ego department) then hee will not take it well. Could this be the case? It sounds very sad , I know, but a few phrases along th lines of "no-one has ever done it like that", "baby you are the best" or "gosh you're huge" work wonders. they are almost always lies (apart from when said to me obviously) but that doesnt matter. Once he is happy and confident she can train him to do what she likes. Men are like dogs. pats on the head are a good training tool.

[melandraf]

Men... Can't live with 'em. can't shoot 'em...

[raven8401]

Just go ahead and ask him what is going on. What's the worst thing tha can happen.