am i out of the ordinary?

[pork_scratch]

do alot of people take recreational drugs and smoke weed regularly? i'm 30 and thought most people got over all that in their 20s. My ex made me feel really straight because i objected to her taking ectasy or something at a bbq she had invited me to. Am i expecting too much?

[mountainboo]

Whats wrong with being 'straight' pork? It's her problem if she wants to mess up her own life, why should she be so selfish by making you feel bad for advising her not to take it. You are obviously looking out for her. I'm sorry but I have no sympathy for people who take recreational drugs, in my opinion it's a contribution to the social breakdown of our country.

[pork_scratch]

i also got into trouble for criticising her friend who was smoking weed in front of their children.. oh dear.

[wigglebum]

You shouldn't feel straight about it just because you don't do it yourself. I should think all of my friends have done it or do it but I've never wanted to and don't intend to either.

But in answer to your question yes lots of people take recreational drugs and smoke the weed regularly its just one of those things.

[wigglebum]

She should not smoke weed infront of children

[Octavius]

Ecstasy at a barbecue? Crikey it must have been very dull.

Generally (in my generation at least) use of recreational drugs dwindled with the onset of age and the offset of going to places where it is the norm. Some people continue of course without association to raves, clubs or general nights in/out and carry it on in their own homes � usually alone. That�s their choice, and if clinging to that nostalgic sense of childhood abandon and reminiscence of the good old days makes them feel young again and happy with themselves then so be it. You don�t have to join them.

[tiny e.a]

I don't really have a problem at all with young adults taking recreational drugs, I don't believe it does them any particular favours or gives them any kind of credibility, but I also don't think that, if it's just recreationally, it leads to any kind of social breakdown or is a cause of criminality.

However, I personally think that people, probably over 25, definitely over 30, who still take them are ridiculous, I'm embarassed for them hat they haven't grown out of it.

[amonty1144]

I don't think you're straight, i believe it is the right way to be, recreational drugs mess up so many lives.
I work in childcare and the damage that drugs and alochol does to families and children's lives is unbelievable.
Smoking weed in front of kids is destructive, un fortunately it normalises drug taking behaviour and therefore kids thing it is ok.
Stand up for yourself I believe you're right.
When I went to uni many years ago, drug taking was the exception, now it's the norm...strange

[wigglebum]

The effects these things have on peoples faces is enough for me. Getting old you can't do anything about, but my god I've seen some images of people on drugs and it don't look good.

I thought people taking pills in the pub was sad enough but at a BBQ Jesus!!

[TickleTheCat]

Hmmm well I'm probably going to get slammed for this but here goes.... I'm 51 and occasionally I smoke grass... It's usually when I'm on my own and at home listening to music or sometimes with likeminded friends when a game of Scrabble can make you weak from laughing.
This year I was sitting on a deserted beach in Greece one evening and smoked a joint. It was very relaxing and made the experiance memorable.

[Champagne]

I'm anti-drugs too... but for me. I tend not to comment on other people doing it though, unless it indirectly starts to affect me or my lifestyle.

It is tricky in relationships, because at some time or other it's bound to have an effect on you. I've been out with a few guys who have been full-time smokers, or worse, a coke-addict. It really doesn't work for me longterm I have to say. It's always been addressed as an issue.

Still, I've moved on and left them to their habit...

[4getmenot]

I have never needed drugs I'm nuts enough. I dont see the point of monging out all night on drugs and looking ugly while off your face. But I have had mates that do and have never told them its silly, That is their life and their business and they will learn in their own way.

[kctgreat]

I say you're well rid of her.

[4getmenot]

and my mates used to do heroine at 16 when I'd sit there and not touch it. They asked me once and I said dont you ever ask me that again. They probably moaned about me at the time but now I have a life and they are loners in bedsits and have had children taken away. They all wish now that they hadnt have got on the stuff.

[Skreecheeboy]

Yes a lot of people do. I believe there's a time and a place for it and I don' think they should be done in front of kids but I believe that if all the world leaders sat down and got muntered together we really could achieve world peace.

[nutgoneflake]

Have courage in your convictions, and sod everyone who doesn't agree!

I've always said no, and never felt uncomfortable with saying it. People have tried to MAKE me feel uncomfortable, but it's never worked. I don't have a problem with people around me smoking a bit, or at least I didn't years ago. These days, none of my friends do drugs and as tiny said, I feel embarrassed for those who haven't grown up and left it all behind them at Uni or whatever. I know some of my friends from those days are really suffering now, not from any hard stuff, but just from so-called 'harmless' smoking cannabis. At least two have mental health issues; another hasn't held down a job for years, has had two failed marriages where cannabis was a huge factor in the breakdown, and has two children who he NEVER sees. He doesn't even know where they are. He doesn't go anywhere or do anything, just smokes his joints and plays on the Playstation constantly like some 13 year old. He's 40 next year!

Way to go, him...

pork_scratch, stick with it and remember you're not straight for saying no! I've always been doubtful that a good time must equate to how off your head you are. I have a great time, most of the time - no crutch required!! xx

[Scarlett]

None of my mates take any drugs but then we are in our 30s and all have proper jobs and kids etc. I have never heard of ecstacy at a BBQ. I think she is the one with a problem, not you!

[Octavius]

Skreech, if that happened, then the world would be rife with perfidy and military coups. We would probably end up with Mugabe-types everywhere. See, when people sit on their arses and try to escape oblivion, they actually end up in oblivion. In the meantime, the rest of the world has moved on.

[Skreecheeboy]

I disagree with you for once Octavious. Do you know that the drug Ecstacy was originally considered to be branded under the name Empathy, for Ronseal Paint and Stain reasons of it doing exactly what it says on the tin! The world could do with a good dose of empathy right now I reckons.

[Goodsoulette]

It sher choice and just as much as she shoukldnt criticise you for not doing it, you shouldn't nag her for doing it. My ex was antidrugs but he would actually have preferred me to smoke joints occasionally and do the odd pill, or bit of bolivian marching powder than to see me smoke straight fags all the time. When we first got together I did it more frequently, I never asked him to do it and he never told me not to.

I wouldn't smoke pot in front of my kids any more than I would smoke in front of them.