Editor's Blog0 min ago
Horrible P.A
72 Answers
I have been in my new job for three weeks and i'm just getting used to the way things are working.
A few days ago, the Directors' P.A came downstairs and had a go at me due to some post being in the wrong folder. The way she did it was out of order as there were people there. I admitted i was wrong, but she was a bit harsh.
A bit later on, she came down again and had another go at me because she thought i was taking too long to complete a task, but the task was difficult and time consuming. She was repeating the same question, 'are you struggling, why is it taking so long?' I got a bit upset and started to cry on Reception (Puff, i know) and she still carried on asking me. Then when i said in a more raised voice, 'no, i'm not struggling, it's just time consuming', she said i had an attitude problem.
I couldn't talk at this point as i was so upset and felt really incompetent and stupid. A visitor then came in and i couldn't answer his questions as i was so upset. Unprofessional in my opinion!!!
Today, there is a meeting and and two of the people were late. So I asked him to sign the visitors book and to take a seat. I told the P.A, he was here and she said ok, carry on with what you're doing and i'll sort it. When i came back to my desk, she had a go at me for not making him a drink, even though she said she's sort it and told me to carry on with what i was doing.
I can't win, i didn't want to complain, because I haven't been here long and they may sack me.
Any advice would be good on what to do next.
A few days ago, the Directors' P.A came downstairs and had a go at me due to some post being in the wrong folder. The way she did it was out of order as there were people there. I admitted i was wrong, but she was a bit harsh.
A bit later on, she came down again and had another go at me because she thought i was taking too long to complete a task, but the task was difficult and time consuming. She was repeating the same question, 'are you struggling, why is it taking so long?' I got a bit upset and started to cry on Reception (Puff, i know) and she still carried on asking me. Then when i said in a more raised voice, 'no, i'm not struggling, it's just time consuming', she said i had an attitude problem.
I couldn't talk at this point as i was so upset and felt really incompetent and stupid. A visitor then came in and i couldn't answer his questions as i was so upset. Unprofessional in my opinion!!!
Today, there is a meeting and and two of the people were late. So I asked him to sign the visitors book and to take a seat. I told the P.A, he was here and she said ok, carry on with what you're doing and i'll sort it. When i came back to my desk, she had a go at me for not making him a drink, even though she said she's sort it and told me to carry on with what i was doing.
I can't win, i didn't want to complain, because I haven't been here long and they may sack me.
Any advice would be good on what to do next.
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I think that would be wise, cheries :o)
Notveryhappy ~ big apologies for hijacking your thread.
That woman should not have spoken to you in that manner in front of other people. if she has issues with you then she should speak to you in private. I have worked in management before and wouldn't dream of taking staff to task in front of other colleagues or the public.
Is the Director's PA actually your line manager? in any case I would arrange a meeting with your line manager to discuss your grievances. Good luck :o)
Notveryhappy ~ big apologies for hijacking your thread.
That woman should not have spoken to you in that manner in front of other people. if she has issues with you then she should speak to you in private. I have worked in management before and wouldn't dream of taking staff to task in front of other colleagues or the public.
Is the Director's PA actually your line manager? in any case I would arrange a meeting with your line manager to discuss your grievances. Good luck :o)
I agree with squarebear, this is bullying and unprofessional - definately go to HR and have this matter put on record. Stay calm though! She (the P.A) may well have been reported before, you never know!
Three weeks is not long. Sorting post into the correct category/area is something that comes easier with time. You probably haven't made acquaintance (or indeed know of) the recipient of a particular item of post. This comes with time. If you are learning a new job you can hardly be expected to get 'everything' right to begin with. I presume you are being shown' the ropes and that you have not been thrown in at the deep end with no guidance? If so 'say so'!
Stay strong and if the P.A does anything like this again in front on other members of staff. Stand your ground and CALMLY say, Do you think we could be more professional and discuss this matter in 'Private?'
The key to remaining 'in control' is to 'ASK' a question - NOT provide an answer - especially when you are being bullied! It puts them on the spot - not you! then discuss -
Once you know EXACTLY how they operate and what they expect you can work from there.
Never apologise for doing your best! [That's assuming you are! - No offence meant but you know what I mean].
'IF' you are struggling with a certain task 'ASK' for help. It's nothing to be ashamed of. You will complete the task more efficiently when you know 'EXACTLY' what you are doing.
It's also worth remembering: We have more than one set of clothes - but only one body. We can only do one thing at a time. If she want a particular job done 'quickly' she can't expect you to keep stopping to deal with customers too! She would be being unreasonable.
TIP: Keep a diary of the situation at home to present to HR should you need to in the future. When you have made your diary entry. FORGET IT! Relax and enjoying your evening,
All
Three weeks is not long. Sorting post into the correct category/area is something that comes easier with time. You probably haven't made acquaintance (or indeed know of) the recipient of a particular item of post. This comes with time. If you are learning a new job you can hardly be expected to get 'everything' right to begin with. I presume you are being shown' the ropes and that you have not been thrown in at the deep end with no guidance? If so 'say so'!
Stay strong and if the P.A does anything like this again in front on other members of staff. Stand your ground and CALMLY say, Do you think we could be more professional and discuss this matter in 'Private?'
The key to remaining 'in control' is to 'ASK' a question - NOT provide an answer - especially when you are being bullied! It puts them on the spot - not you! then discuss -
Once you know EXACTLY how they operate and what they expect you can work from there.
Never apologise for doing your best! [That's assuming you are! - No offence meant but you know what I mean].
'IF' you are struggling with a certain task 'ASK' for help. It's nothing to be ashamed of. You will complete the task more efficiently when you know 'EXACTLY' what you are doing.
It's also worth remembering: We have more than one set of clothes - but only one body. We can only do one thing at a time. If she want a particular job done 'quickly' she can't expect you to keep stopping to deal with customers too! She would be being unreasonable.
TIP: Keep a diary of the situation at home to present to HR should you need to in the future. When you have made your diary entry. FORGET IT! Relax and enjoying your evening,
All
In your day Doc they didn�t have internet, let alone Answerbank. No doubt you took long breaks beside the coffee machine to gripe about everyone and everything. Strange though, because if ignorance really is bliss, I would have though you would always be happy.
PAs tend to believe that they are at the same level as the person they are PA to. The PA to the MD in our office thinks she practically runs the place and many of the younger girls here fear her wrath � she is well connected, and lets you know, often. She even bullies around a lot of the partners here, even though they are hierarchically higher than she will ever be and earn 8 times her salary. She is a bull and most people hate her, but she has been round for years.
You are either going to need to talk to a representative who may be able to help you, or toughen up a bit and stand your ground. To do the latter you need to prove you can do your job efficiently, and stop the silly crying at reception � this loses you a lot of respect and sympathy in business I�m afraid. One step at a time, as said above she may feel intimidate by you, especially being the new talent for the senior men in the company to ogle and removing her limelight. Tread carefully as she no doubt has some semblance of power and influence, but maybe has got away with being a bully because people have shied away from her rage.
PAs tend to believe that they are at the same level as the person they are PA to. The PA to the MD in our office thinks she practically runs the place and many of the younger girls here fear her wrath � she is well connected, and lets you know, often. She even bullies around a lot of the partners here, even though they are hierarchically higher than she will ever be and earn 8 times her salary. She is a bull and most people hate her, but she has been round for years.
You are either going to need to talk to a representative who may be able to help you, or toughen up a bit and stand your ground. To do the latter you need to prove you can do your job efficiently, and stop the silly crying at reception � this loses you a lot of respect and sympathy in business I�m afraid. One step at a time, as said above she may feel intimidate by you, especially being the new talent for the senior men in the company to ogle and removing her limelight. Tread carefully as she no doubt has some semblance of power and influence, but maybe has got away with being a bully because people have shied away from her rage.
As per squarebear's answer. It is bullying.
Are you answerable to this woman. If not, remind her politely that she is not your boss and if she does not refrain from humiliating/undermining you, you will make a complaint to HR. Confront her in a positive and calm way and show you are a confident person. She is obviously feeding on your insecurity at the moment. Anyone worth their weight would be trying to help a new employee to setting in. Unfortunately, there are a lot of people around that are similar to her - usually jumped up and very often inefficient an unsure of themselves.
Are you answerable to this woman. If not, remind her politely that she is not your boss and if she does not refrain from humiliating/undermining you, you will make a complaint to HR. Confront her in a positive and calm way and show you are a confident person. She is obviously feeding on your insecurity at the moment. Anyone worth their weight would be trying to help a new employee to setting in. Unfortunately, there are a lot of people around that are similar to her - usually jumped up and very often inefficient an unsure of themselves.
Doc - why did you contribute to this thread seeing you have nothing worthwhile to say. Got period pains today mate??
My ex had much the same problem with a "executive PA" that rose from tea girl and thought she knew better than her MD boss and lorded it all over the fellow staff like a tyrant. it was bullying (as helpful people are saying here) and yes youo should have a word with HR section and have your views noted. But do it carefully - don't put in a complaint - just ask them to note that madame defarge is giving you a hard time and you are still new and trying to get up to speed in a new routine. Just say nicely "how can I please this lady?" as if you are really willing and trying to fit in everywhere.
I would think the PA has a track record and is well known for her hostility and her "better than thou" attitude. She shrouds herself in an aura of indispensability which is self assumed as we all, including her, are dispensible.
I doubt if many can do right in her eyes so talk to someone and have it noted (talk as worried/concerned) and not as a moaner/complainer and you'll do ok.
My ex had much the same problem with a "executive PA" that rose from tea girl and thought she knew better than her MD boss and lorded it all over the fellow staff like a tyrant. it was bullying (as helpful people are saying here) and yes youo should have a word with HR section and have your views noted. But do it carefully - don't put in a complaint - just ask them to note that madame defarge is giving you a hard time and you are still new and trying to get up to speed in a new routine. Just say nicely "how can I please this lady?" as if you are really willing and trying to fit in everywhere.
I would think the PA has a track record and is well known for her hostility and her "better than thou" attitude. She shrouds herself in an aura of indispensability which is self assumed as we all, including her, are dispensible.
I doubt if many can do right in her eyes so talk to someone and have it noted (talk as worried/concerned) and not as a moaner/complainer and you'll do ok.
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