Ending It

[milton]

i`ve been in a relationship for just under a year, it has been tough, and i`ve decided i`ve had enough, i`ve tried telling her 3 times, but she cries, i feel terrible, and i agree to stay. I know that i don`t love her, but i do care what happens to her. I thought about writing a letter -telling her, or just moving my stuff when she`s not there. Does anyone have any ideas.

[Yinzer]

If you don't love her then you're doing her an injustice by being with her out of pity - doesn't she deserve someone who truly loves her? And you are doing yourself an injustice by (a) missing out on other women who you may grow to feel something for - don't you deserve to be with someone you truly love? and (b) compromising your integrity and being someplace you don't want to be. Be a man about it, tell her "no offense but I'm outta here" and don't let her play any of her silly woman games with you. Like my husband says, it's better to just chop off the cat's tail than to keep pulling and pulling on it. And by the way, this category is actually for suggestions about the site and the best category for questions like this is Body and Soul. I don't mean to sound so callous about this, but it's your job to keep the bullcrap out of your life.

[sft42]

Far far far better to break her heart once than do it over and over again and again no? Take a day off work pack your bags and get everything out of there in one fell swoop, then go back and sit down and tell her you have left and this time it's for good and then don't look back....If she can cope with you leaving then in the fullness of time you can maybe both be friends but Don't be her shoulder to cry on just now....this might only lead to you both ending up back together again for whatever reason and you don't want that again.

Don't drag it out anymore...if the relationship is finished then end it and move on...life is too short for both of you and the pain ain't worth it just to get out of the pain of splitting up.

[ll_billym]

I don't think that this is the right category for asking about relationships. I think that this is the category for suggesting that the website start a category on relationships. However, if you want some advice then I would say that no matter how much she cries and how cruel you feel about leaving her you are being 10 times more cruel by making her think that you want to stay with her when you don't. Don't worry about the crying, women cry all the time, she'll be ok. I wouldn't suggest this in all cases but if you've told her 3 times then it won't come totally out of the blue. I would move all your stuff out when she isn't there but make sure that you are when she comes home to give her the good news. If she contacts you after, listen to her, be polite but that is all. Good luck.

[vittoria]

Have you thought of enlisting the help of some close friends to send her on a blind date or something like that?

[binbomashady]

i u r still with her then u probably still love and care for her, mate