Is he just flirting with me?

[4getmenot]

The other day I had a msg on FB from a bloke that I used to work with asking what I'd been up to. He asked if I missed him to which I said 'course, you were a good worker' he works in my local pub and used to quietly give me free drinks and I've just always thought he was being nice because we worked together. He said he couldn't be bothered keep going on FB so he gave me his number to txt him so I txt him and had a chat, he asked whether I'd be out soon and said he'd buy me another drink I said that it hardly comes out his pocket and he said 'well see what I'd risk for a lovely looking mate'. Anyway first thing this morning I get a msg saying 'hey good looking what you up to' so I said I may be out this weekend and he then said 'well if you want a hug or anything let me know' so is he flirting, being friendly, being too friendly I jyst don't know. I don't want to say ok lay off and sound big headed if he isn't. I was going to say 'well yer I;m coming out coz my BOYFRIEND is watching boxing' but then decided not too I've never had to tell anyone I have a boyfriend before to warn them off. What do I do? He got married last year its all a bit strange he's suddenly txting me.

[redcrx]

ooooh do i know him?????? tell me who it is and i may be able to tell ya what hes doing

[jayp1978]

Hi there yea sounds like he's fishing for info. If he's married then he could be looking for a bit extra. His wording seems strange considering you didn't go out with him before & seemed to give you his mobile fairly quickly. Maybe ask him something like "hows married life?" If he doesn't talk about it much or try change subject then warning bells should ring. IMHO it does sound dodgy to me

[4getmenot]

No you don�t he�s very young redcrx. I just don�t know why suddenly he�s messaging me. He never really spoke to me at work. I�d speak in pub and when I used to go to pay him he�d say no don�t worry I just thought he was being friendly. I did Just say after the hug msg, hey dint you get married last year and he replied with �shhhh don�t tell anyone�

[redcrx]

probably just innocent flirting sis. Just mention your bf in passing and he may just go quiet or may carry on to be a friend.

[jayp1978]

Ok 4getmenot he's looking for a bit of the side, He won't talk about his marrage, It sounds like he his interested on a bit on the side. If you don't mind being that woman then feel free but i would go with i got a b/f story & see what he says. But i bet he will try push things forward or ask to see you. So you got 2 options either go with it & see what happens or tell him your not interested as he's married

[4getmenot]

I have got a boyfriend lol. No story there. But even when I get chatted up in the pub I don�t come out with �I have a boyfriend� as an excuse to get away� I managed to put them down gently when I didn�t have a boyfriend before and I can now. I�ll just harmless flirt back then and get as many drinks as I can out of him tomorrow. lol

[jayp1978]

Ok am confused if your jus gonna flirt with him then can't blame him for thinking something might happen. Like i said you got 2 choices you either go with the flow & see what happens/deal with consiquenses (if either of you get caught) or cool it down saying not comfy with situation as he's married & you have a b/f.

[4getmenot]

That�s why I�m asking. I don�t mean overly flirt I mean just chat as I did before with him, I can come cross quite flirty but think he has wrong idea. Also don�t want to say look I have a boyfriend if he�s not even flirting. Think you took it wrong as I�m a woman that would cheat, I would never do that to my man.

[4getmenot]

I meant if he�s silly enough to be flirting when he�s married then maybe I should just take the drinks :-)

[4getmenot]

I think he knows he is flirting. He just said �do you want me to lay off I do get carried away sorry� Just out of the blue

[jayp1978]

well if your silly enough to think that he's just looking for a drink then go for it. Am sure his Mrs won't mind. Dangerous game but each to their own. You asked for advise just giving mine. But as a bloke it seems to me he's wanting more than a drink. As i stated above you have 2 choices. Hope my info helps but untimatly it is up to you on what you feel comfy doing. But bet you �10 he wants more than a drink

[jayp1978]

Ok my last post on this as i'll just be repeating myself (jus read you last post). The guy is looking for a bit on the side so just upto you if you wanna be that woman.

[4getmenot]

He works behind the bar, its not him asking me out for a drink. Before he would just give me them free but now he�s started txting I;m not sure whether to accept. I guess I wouldn�t if he was free and single so not to give him wrong idea, but because he�s married it makes me want to take the free drink and go back to my bloke at home :-) sorry if you don�t quite understand some others on here might know my personality a bit by now to know I can give as good as I get. :-)

[4getmenot]

Ok he just said I can stop flirting if you like so I just said �well I don�t mind a bit of flirting and banter as much as the next guy, you are married I have a bloke so we both know where we are coming from anyway�

[NORMANTHEDOG]

all he wants to do is shag you,and by the sound of you,he will get his way

[4getmenot]

Norman I know for definate he wont. Thats why I asked is he flirting. I have just told him I have a bloke. this is the advice I asked Because I didn�t want to say back off incase it was just harmless. You dont know me at all.

[4getmenot]

Funny how some people think flirting with a girl will get them into bed. There are a lot of strong women out there norman

[Panic Button]

Norman may have been wrong on his second point, but I'm afraid he is absolutely spot on with his first.

[4getmenot]

yer maybe. Panic button me and you flirt on here, well you flirt more with me lol but doesnt mean I would give it to you on a plate. Well after I said 'you are married I have a bloke etc' he hasnt msgd so I guess he's backed off. Just hope it isnt awkward with him in pub never has been before

[redcrx]

OMG, just because he may fancy you and flirt with you doesnt mean that either of you would do anything!

one of my best mates flirts with me, but thats all! Neither of us would ever cross that line, or want to!

Just dont put yourself in a position where his girlfriend may think its something else