Flowers

[Chasingcars]

Getting married in April 2010 and in April of this year (ie in plenty of time) contacted our Church to confirm they were happy if we used our own florist. They agreed and so we continued with our plans and finalised what arrnagements we would have and where etc.
We have now been sent the official wedding 'pack' with forms for Wedding Application, music choices etc and there is a form in this pack relating to flowers - which suggests we speak to the Church Florist to agree where flowers can and canot be place within the Church.
I duly rang said flower lady and everything I mentioned we would like, she said no for one of many reasons...most of them ''no, we dont 'do' that''.
So I am a little frustrated that this was not advised when i first asked about using my own florist as clearly had I known i couldnt put flowers in certain places, I would not have agreed with my own florist to do that, (and costed as such) and secondly dont feel the reasons given by Chruch flower lady as being proper 'reasons' if that makes sense? Without wanting to be disrespectful to said flower lady, I contacted Church office to speak to main contact who said she would speak to flower lady as what we wanted didint seem particularly unusual. (To confirm we want a flower arch over the door, arrnagment on the font, two pew ends on top two pews, one pedestal and flowers on a windowstill)
I have now been asked to see the church flower lady in person at the Church to talk through our requirements. If she is like she was on the phone, I dont feel going to the Church will make her have any different decisions, but my question is is there a definitive rule book of where you can and cannot place flowers in a Church? I understood the Chuch was meant for everyone, but the way I am feeling is people who have been there longer or have certain jobs make the decisions even if they make no sense!

[Ankou]

just a jobsworth over-exercising her limited powers probably.
speak to the vicar if no joy, after all you are paying for it

[coccinelle]

She's put out that somebody else will be doing the flowers on her territory. You can always say that this florist you're using is somebody you know and admire her own handywork when you're in there.

[tigerlily11]

I don't think it is really down to her. It's not like she owns or runs the church. It's down to the vicar. If he is ok wit it than she doesn't have a choice and if she can't do those things then she isn't much of a flower lady is she.
stand your ground and don't let her use what ever to bully the vicar into doing it her way.
English church commuities. You can't beat them for weird and sometimes scary people.
If she cannot come up with a good reason then she doesn't have a say. She is just the flower lady and not the man upstairs

[Chasingcars]

thanks for your messages, that was my thoughts. However after the Chuch office lady spoke to flower lady, she rang me to say best if i meet church flower lady at the church. After speaking to my florist she said it would be easier for her to talk direct to the Church - flower lady to flower lady! However the Chruch lady is still not budging and just being unreasonable in my opinion.
So as it stands i have to re-jig all of my arrnagements and budget to fit in with their requirmetns.
I feel a little unfair as i had i known these rules earlier i could have worked with them from the start, not that they make any sense. Should I speak to the Vicar next as i am still not happy? Dont want to look like Im moaning and cause anyone upset but feel strongly one person can cause so much upheaval. How should I approach this with the vicar?!?

[whitelady]

I would arrange a time and date to meet up with your Vicar to discuss the wedding ceremony and then by the way bring up the flowers and say how disappointed you are that you cannot have your friend doing the flowers for you because of the church flower lady and ask him if there is any way round it. Knowing what men are like he will probably say to go ahead with the flowers as he would just think you would be putting a few here and there and it would be the least of his worries , good luck!!

[Chasingcars]

Well we spoke to the Vicar and seeing him next Wednesday night. We have to run throguh order of service/ hymns etc so will add this on my 'list' to discuss. hopefully he we can come to some compromise.
I wonder if a generous donation towards the Church roof fund would change anyones minds!!

[gauri_chinu]

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