love

[4getmenot]

My mate rang me today to tell me her and her husband are splitting up. Shocked me a bit as they got together about 10 years ago, he was her first they then rented a place, then got married and bought a house etc , they have been trying for a baby for past year or so but were having problems. So when she rang today and said she had some news I thought she was about to say she was pregnant. I always used to say I wish my life had been like hers, get a bloke young, get married then have babies. But thinking about it today I am actually quite happy I had all the single fun I had when I split up with my first boyfriend. I think I learned from that. Does anyone know anyone that got married young and are still together, apart from people in there 60's upwards. She said she just didnt love him anymore and that getting some other male attention recently made her realise she hasnt loved him for about 2 years. So are you all happy and do you think its best to do what society expects, virgin, get married, live togather, have family or do you think people need some life experience before they settle for the one?

[Count-A-Strong]

I think it's a complete lottery. You could meet the person of your dreams at 18 or 81.

[4getmenot]

I just think nowadays theres too many othet temptations when young. I know this girl often thought about what she had missed out on. I guess I did all that so didnt miss out and am now at a stage where I know the grass isnt greener

[jno]

I have some friends who've been together for 40 years and others nearly as long; but others the same age are on their third partners. (Funny, I don't know anyone on their second partner.) But like Count says, it can just happen any time. If you're happy together, and know how to give and take and compromise and not ask for the moon, it can last forever. But you do have to be prepared to work at it. Nothing's ever perfect.

I wonder if there's more to her 'getting some other male attention recently'.

[4getmenot]

No there isnt jno, she said she could have gone with him but didnt, but it made her realise she didnt love her husband. This other bloke lives other side of country they just met through work. I have told her now she has told her husband to not pursue this other bloke until she is happy in herself.

[Meg]

I met my husband when I was 14, he got me "up the duff" when I was 15, we married as soon as I was 16. We have been married over 40 years, most of them happy but some were certainly not. We have 3 wonderful sons and a couple of grandkids. The other man's grass can always look greener but I'm very happy with the route I went down.

[4getmenot]

but did you ever think what if? Has there always been passion between you and your husband or are you more like mates?

[Count-A-Strong]

How rude!

[Meg]

Passion!!! At our age?? We've both had other temptations over the years, but we're still together. He gets on my nerves constantly, call him Victor, but god forbid he wasn't here.

[4getmenot]

I guess thats how she got after 3 years of marriage lol. Whats rude count?

[Meg]

Yes count, who are you calling rude?

[4getmenot]

If it was to me asking the question. I dont know meg and they dont know me, so I didnt see harm in asking, they didnt have to answer I would have understood. Just want some kind of insight. I hope mine and my blokes passion never dies. He went away last week and I missed him so much, we were at it like rabbits when he got home lol

[Count-A-Strong]

Calm down calm down. I was only joking. Stick yer HRT patches on and drink some cammomile tea.

[4getmenot]

as if you were :-) And I cant stand tea yuk

[Meg]

Can't stand tea either, just be happy with the bloke you're with now, ride it for as long as it lasts (maybe forever). Just be happy 4getmenot, life is short, enjoy what you can. Quote from a friend of mine who died recently, she was 41 always signed off with "I wish you luv luck and lafta"

[Count-A-Strong]

I have a border collie miss meg. He's nearly seven and has a patch just over one eye.

[4getmenot]

Oh I'm happy meg, that is what I'm trying to say is that I think I'm happy because I had from about the age of 19 to 30 going out and having fun after I broke up with my first boyfriend which I feel I learnt alot from then got with my bloke who I've been with for 3 years because I was finally at a point in my life to settle down. But your mate sounds like she knows what she's talking about :-)

[karenmac60]

I don't think it's so much a case of the grass being greener 4get, but that women aren't as dependant on their husbands these days. They are capable of earning a decent wage and supporting themselves so they don't have to stay in an unhappy marriage. People of say, my parents' generation (early 60s) didn't have that option so there was less divorce, but that doesn't mean all those marriages that lasted were happy ones. Just make the most of what you've got x

[4getmenot]

very true karen and probably even harder once they had children.

[Meg]

Well count, if you have a border collie I'm begining to warm to you. (No monkey business mind)Phew, that would be too scary!! 4getme not, thank you for starting this post, I've enjoyed it. Hope to speak again, Wendyxx

[4getmenot]

very nice to meet you wendy 4get xx