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Getting on with neighbours

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Scarlett | 13:15 Tue 05th Oct 2010 | Body & Soul
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I have recently moved into a first floor flat and the noise from the upstairs flat is driving me mad. Thing is, they are not actually doing anything wrong. They have their tv on and talk quite loudly until late at night. Last night the man's voice kept me awake until 2am as did their clumping around. It's not loud music or anti-social bahaviour, but it is still making my life here a misery; plus I have to stay for 6 months! Any thoughts on how I could tackle it? I was thinking of writing a note just to make them aware but was not sure how to word it..
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It's difficult when you don't want to offend people. Any chance you could pop a note through their door introducing yourself and asking if they could pop down for a drink or cup of coffee at such and such a time as there's something you wanted to talk to them about?
Sound can carry a lot in flats and it's quite possible there's unaware of hjow their activities are affecting you if the flats are not well soundproofed and they're up top with nobody above them.
I think it's a case of getting use to it.
i agree with ummmmm, if it's not anti social behaviour and just normal living noise then there's not much you can do except learn to live with it. one of the joys of living in a flat unfortunately....and it doesn't seem to make any difference if you are above or below, you can get an equal amount of noise from people living below you.
you just have to try and tune out.
Which you do eventually Ethan. I moved from a quiet street to a busy one. Took me ages to get use to the traffic noise. Did in the end though..
Is the flat above carpeted....a good carpet would help to muffle some of the noise, and many landlords require that upper floors be carpeted. Also,noise after a certain hour, that affects your quality of living- may be an issue.
I would think this is a problem with the building rather than a problem with the neighbours. It's the drawback of living in some flats, particularly the more modern ones. I think there is very little you can do. You can hardly ask your neighbours to keep their voices down if it's just ordinary conversation - different if they were having slanging matches.
i had the same problem years ago get some waxed earplugs it cuts out all sounds.
Have a small housewarming and invite them - making friends with them seems like a good idea. You make friends with them and it will be easier to communicate about noise issues.
I think Lottie may be onto at least 80% of the problem, Scarlett. The fashion for wood floors instead of carpets, and powerful sound systems with TVs has all added to noise levels going up. I bet you find they have minimalist decor, hard floors etc if you were to look. If the flat is your own property, it will be worth looking to deaden the sound on your side of the ceiling and if you have a google for sound-proffing solutions you'll find some useful info. It'll basically involve installing a shallow false ceiling stuffed with sound-deadening (and fire-resistant) materials. Even if rented, you could badger the landlord about this.
Other useful ploys I have used in noisy conditions include: using earplugs, either wax ones (hard to find now) or those industrial ones that look like mini bean bags; playing a talk radio station whisper - quiet next to my head - distracts my attention from exterior noise; running a rotary fan - makes 'white noise' that masks (as I found) even Spanish teenagers partying in narrow stone streets late at night; plugging in ipod with a long storybook on it, very quietly, again distraction technique.
Good advice Mosaic about the soundproofing.

I have a friend who lives in a minimalist house, with wooden and tile floors and nothing to absorb the noise. When she phones me her voice sounds really loud and echos as if she is in an empty building.

No chance of that in my house, minimalist we are not (cluttered with are!!).
Never having lived in a flat, this is the stuff of my nightmares. I can imagine sounds coming from above, below, left, right, opposite.....I do sympathise and am so lucky to live in a quiet location in a semj with quiet neighbours.
In addition, the idea of your own noise generator next to your bed is a good one. Strangely, where other peoples' noise is a nuisance, your own noise can be comforting. I have one of these with a choice of several different sounds, including white noise, to help with sleeping (I have Menieres Syndrome and have a lot of tinnitus, noticeably at night). They are available from RNID and I have seen one in a Maplins store - well worth a try.
gingejbee. That's interesting. Hubby has tinnitus so that might help him, and might help me cope with his snoring better and all the other little noises that keep me awake (I am a light sleeper). I will look into that. Thanks xx
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LL: I was lucky, Argos used to sell one and I got it in a sale for a tenner. There are several available from RNID.but pricier. I wouldn't be without it- I take it on holiday,even!
ginge - I have now looked at the RNID site and will try to find some elsewhere. They could be the answer that I am looking for to unwind as well (I am a very anxious person). Thanks again. Definitely am looking to purchase one. xx
I use ear plugs to block out snoring. However, I don't like them and they tend to give me earache!
i have those blue plastercine like substance earplugs from south africa they´re brill. no earache, and they work, well say work, they cut out noise above 33 decibels.
havent got an address, but if interested just google earplugs
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Thanks for your ideas! I also have tinnitus which is what makes my ears so ridiculously sensitive - not at a high pitched level but at low man's voice level. I can handle street and traffic noise- I live on a main road, just not the male boomy voice. I have the TV on at night AND wear foam ear plugs, and even then the voice still seems louder than ever. I wish I could just find a way of blocking out the very low frequencies...

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