Can't work him out

[magic number]

A while back I met a guy on a night out. From then I saw him a few times. I asked him if he wanted to go to the cinema sometime and and he said he should say no because he didnt want anything serious and he didnt want to give me the wrong idea. As we had only seen each other a few times that was fine by me, I knew what the score was. I have been going to his quite a bit recently at his request and yesterday while I was there he mentioned about the two of us going to the cinema this week. I had mentioned a film i wanted to see and he told me he had it on DVD but lent it to someone so we could watch it when I came round next weekend (seemed as though it was expected that I would be coming round next week). Then later on he was talking about on of the pubs in the local village and how he had walked there a few times, then he said something along the lines of one day I will take you for a walk over there and we will have a meal together. I don't know if Im looking too much in to what he has said but does this mean he is interested now? From a month or so ago, not wanting to go anywhere with me to now where he seems to be planning quite a few things. Can anyone give me some advice on how to play this? I really like him so I dont really want to ask him in case I have totally got the wrong idea. Sorry for being so long!

[boobesque]

Hi, i think you are worrying too much! Just relax and play it by ear, he may be interested now as he has spent more time with you. My bf told me he didnt want anything serious, until he thought i fancied someone else! we moved in together after 4 months!

If you havent already agreed to next weekend, maybe say that you are busy and will let him know if you can make it, see what his reaction is, then maybe afetr a day or 2 say 'i'm out such and such on saturday, but i am free sunday afternnon' or whichever, i would play along with it for a while, i agreed with my bf not to be serious, carried on as i would normally and played it cool a bit and got my man!

I would wait until you feel more comfortable with him before you ask him what he wants, you never know he may tell you! he does seem to like you more than he lets on as he is planning ahead which many blokes wont do if they dont like you that much.

Relax, have fun and enjoy it!

good luck x

[MargeB]

u....r....in....there.....

firstly...if a guy says he won't go to the cinema with you so that something does not happen, it means he knows that if he starts dating you, something will happen, which means he fancies you.

secondly...going round to his house a lot, probably to him means you are in a relationship.

thirdly...walking out from his for a meal at the local pub? i hear wedding bells.

guys are extremely poor at developing relationships, this is a major set of steps you have taken already. I should start buying nappies if I were you.

play hard to get.

[MargeB]

boobesque, please can you stop typing while I am typing my posts, thank you.

[georgit79]

Ask him. He's got you right where he wants you, as he's made it clear(ish) at the beginning that you shouldn't come on too strong as it'll scare him off, so now he's got things going exactly as he wants them. He definitely likes you (a lot), as it's very rare for guys to talk about stuff that might happen 2 minutes into the future, let alone a couple of weeks!

Ask him if he likes you (he'll say yes, don't worry), and take it from there. You need to have a basis to work from, so no more pussy-footing around!

Oh, and play hard to get if you can stand it, but it makes me feel sick, all the game playing! Just be yourself and you'll be fine.

PS: MargeB- intelligent, funny and clued-up about relationships? Is there anything you don't know?!

[FP]

Agree with MargeB.  Play hard to get (but not too hard!)  Sorry Georgit, I can't agree with you on this.  I think asking him at this stage would be wrong as boobesque just relax and play it by ear.  He obviously likes you but let him tell you in his own good time.  Don't force the situation.

[georgit79]

Probably why I don't have a boyfriend- I never get it right! Just hate playing games, silly business. Oh well, back to the drawing board!

[magic number]

Ha ha, you all make me laugh so much! Thanks for your answers. Feeling quite positive about it now, I was half expecting everyone to say he is just messing around. I shall play it cool, see if he does take me out this week and take it from there. I tell you what though, that meal better be bloody good!

[boobesque]

aw, i am sureit will, when me and my bloke go out, quite rare with as we have a little one, we dont really notice the food, even now as we talk so much, we kind of munch the food without realising!

[missmooncat]

He sounds just as confused as you.Its obvious he`s interested in you,sounds like he`s scared to get involved maybe he had bad experience in past.I agree play by ear,he definately likes you.Keep us posted