Age gap between children.

[JOEYGREEN]

Me and my fiance have a 5 year old son. He is starting school this September (sob) and we have recently been talking about having another child. We get married next June and agree that after we get wed would be the right time. If all goes to plan, there will be a 7 year age gap. I don't know anyone who has such a big gap between each child and don't know how this will effect their relationship. I would want them to be close but don't see how they can be even though my son is such a lovely caring little boy (I'll have no problems on that front). Does anyone have any experience of this?

[Ethel]

There is 17 years between my sister and I, and 12 years between my brother and I.

Age gaps are no problem, and there is not a right or wrong age gap.

The most important thing is that the baby is wanted by both parents and your son is involved from an early-ish stage so that he feels involved.

I am sure he will love the kudos of being 'big brother'.

Even siblings born very close together do not always get on, and drift apart in adulthood.
I'm sure all will be fine.

[JOEYGREEN]

Many thanks Ethel. My fiance and I have wanted another child for a while now but it just hasn't been the right time for one reason or another. We feel it would be the right time next year. My son is at that age where he is asking for a brother or a sister (as they do), so all in all the baby will definitely be wanted and loved and cared for. It was just the age gap that was worrying me but I see your point about siblings born close together not always getting along. Thanks again!

[mycats]

Ask B00 !!

[kate1976]

There's 11 years between me and my brother and apart from the odd sibling rivalry fight it hasn't been bad!

My friend had another baby 9 years after her first and there doesn't seem to be any problems there!

So long as you spread out the attention between the two you'll be fine!

[B00]

Lol, thanks for that Cat.....

I've got 16 years between my 1st daughter and 2nd. The 7year age gap will be nothing, they'll get along fine, and you'll probably find you've got a mini helper if you involve him in the baby (which im sure you will!)

Congrats on you getting married and good luck with the baby trying.

xxxx

[boobesque]

age gaps arent relevant to how your children will get on, personality comes into it quite a lot, there is 8 years between my sister and myself and we hated eachother, we were just very different, sorry! But there is 13 years between me and my brother and we got on fine! But me and my sister get on really well now, and i myself will have an age gap of nearly 8 years when my baby is born.

[JOEYGREEN]

Thanks all. I'll just keep my fingers crossed.

[PinkFizz]

there is a 12 year age gap between my daughter and my youngest son.

[dorindarasbe]

hi joeygreen, i wish you all the best in your trying for another baby. i had my son who is now 3 nine years after my 2nd daughter was born. my daughters who are 12 and 16 adore him to bits even though sometimes he is a pain in the a**e to them when they want to get on with other things but all children do that anyway whatever age gap there is. best wishes and take care. xxx

[noxlumos]

Hi There is a 20 year gap between our oldest and youngest,and two of our kids that get on better than any of the others are my 18 yar old son and my 8 year old daughter. They are thick as thieves, always playing footie, building tree houses and doing things together that sibliongs nearer in age really couldn't ( like the tree house building). It works really well if the older one is a nice caring peson which your little lad is, so I think it'll be brilliant for them both.

[tradey]

i have a son of 21 a daughter of 17 then my little girl is 2 there is no problem at all shes loved by us all and thats all that counts.she wasnt planned but i wouldnt part with her for the world,7 years is nothing to worry about good luck for the wedding and good luck for the future

[freak_unique]

There is a 17 year age gap between me and my brother and i dont see this as ever being a problem at all. Due to me being so much older than him i tend to really appreciate spending time with him and helping him learn and plus im old enough to spoil him :p i tend to see it as when there is an age gap the bigger it is the less rivalry there tends to be as the older sibling enjoys helping out etc. It is also nice that the younger sibling has an idol / someone to look upto :)
I wouldnt worry about a thing :)

[harriman]

to have a big gap sounds lovely...I had 4 kids in 5 years and they are constantly fighting because they all want attention and can't understand why they can't always get it.

Like Ethel says - there is no right or wrong age gap - its just whats best for you at the time

[JOEYGREEN]

I thought I would post another thank you to you all as there are a lot more replies today. I didn't think many people had big age gaps but it looks like I was wrong and it all seems fine with most of you. Although we won't be trying for another year yet, I am feeling very positive about it now. Just today me and my little boy went to visit my friend and her little baby girl. The baby started crying and my son tried to console her. He just couldn't understand why she was still crying and started crying himself because he thought she was upset! How sweet. I then explained to him that she was just tired and hungry and wanted a bottle and he cheered up and said "Mummy, when we have our baby I will give her a bottle and rock her to sleep" Bless him. He will definitely be the best brother in the world. Take care all and thanks.