Was I right?

[Shirl]

Have been on a site for a while, its a friends/dating one. Had this chap messaging me. He is married, so I told him, I would rather not chat to a married man. I thought it unfair to his wife, even though the messages totally innocent.

He says I should be able to talk to anyone I want. If not I will live my life within 4 walls and never meet anyone. He said it was "useful advice"!

I didn't reply to that message. But was he right?

[caz247]

was he heck lol
i am on a dating site and i got told by more than one person i wouldn't meet anyone with no pic on my profile
i replied to the last person who said it telling him i met someone via here without one and we went out for 3 months.
to be honest i don't reply to married ones

[Lady Muck]

Well yes if you never socialise with anyone else ever again.

However the problem is he's married and you don't think it's the right thing to do so stick to your guns and just ignore it. You shouldn't do anything that makes you uncomfortable or compromises your principals.

[Ice.Maiden]

Both right - but of course, the trouble with some of these sites is that you're never sure if the person you're chatting to's married or not!

[blu3wave]

well if he's married, what is the point? If its just friendly chat and you plan to be friends then it should be ok, if anything other than friends, then steer clear until you find out more abt the married nutter. He could just be playing games, as for his useful advice, why doesnt he get a bl00dy divorce from his fat frogface wife if he's so sick of her that he prefers to chat online with strangers instead?
Get some answers and let us know

[Shirl]

hi caz, I don't have my photo on either. I think it was the way he sent this "friendly" advice message. Just made me wonder if I am too stuck in my way of thinking and behaviour. Hence me not meeting anyone.

Hasten to add, I would never date or meet a married man anyway. And didn't know at first he was married. He told me later on.

Thanks for your reply

[caz247]

well most of the married ones do not hide the fact

[blu3wave]

well his advice makes good sense regarding all men except for this black sheep. Married men should be with their wives, and if they're unhappy, sort it out instead of getting other ppl involved in their mess.... its not fair to you, thats all.

[caz247]

shirl
word of advice do not take any notice to anything that blu3wave says she is not normal, posts the most bizzare questions on AB

[Ice.Maiden]

Well that's a blessing then Cazzz - because the ones you meet in the flesh sometimes try to lie, but they're transparent!

[blu3wave]

by sorting it out i mean
(a) a separation
(b) divorce
(c) run away from wife

[Ice.Maiden]

Oh - and I'm sorry - I spelt your name wrong, caz.

[caz247]

i know icemaiden
the site i use they don't even change their status lol

[Shirl]

Thank you for your replies everyone

I feel sorry for his wife

[blu3wave]

I quite like (c).... you could make it out like you were kidnapped and then mysteriously disappeared. You dont have to face the music at home and it'll be an exciting experience at the same time :)

[Shirl]

its just the "friendly advice" he gave me, which sort of got me thinking. Am I just too stuck in my way of thinking.

Of course also, I realise he may still want to stay in contact, so was just saying all that.

Am not totally dumb. Honest!

[Ice.Maiden]

Oh bless, Caz!!! That made me smile. Hope you find someone who's more than half decent then. A friend of mine in Canada did, and she's now married to the guy and very happy!

[caz247]

how is telling you that you won't meet anyone friendly advice
just ignore it it isn't worth bothering about honestly.
if i took every message i get on board i would be neurotic by now, rise above it shirl

[caz247]

thanks icemaiden
i still like the last guy i met though that's another story lol
how long have you got

[Ice.Maiden]

Indeed - and I'm over on "Ban it please" now - it's quite lively!

[Shirl]

yeah, you're right there caz.

Thanks again