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Ahhh guys it's so great that there are people like you in the world.
As you can imagine, it's taken me AGES to even admit it to myself... let alone write it on a website to try and get help!
I get so frustrated with myself with how long it takes me to make decisions. To ACTUALLY step outside and do something it could take weeks of planning. Like McMouse said. It's like every tiny detail needs to be magnified... and by that point you end up going out of your mind with even more anxiety!
Misslideaway - I've never been admitted to A&E or anything because I think I may have only ever gotten that bad once or twice. I'd wake up in the night thinking I was having a heart attack. But of course, to avoid that ever happening again, I just avoided any stressful situations. (It's the wrong way to go about it, I know)
bellieeeee - you're a little star! For about the past 4 months I've been bracing myself to get out to the Doctor. I know that I'll do it, but I'm scared it'll take me actually wanting to die to actually step up and go.
I don't know whether any of you agree (I think you may very well) but suffering with depression makes you an INCREDIBLY deep person. I think so much that it drives me insane.... philosophy, art, poetry, everything. It seems it's the intelligent ones who suffer with excruciating depression most. Over analysing turns to worrying, turns to panic attacks and then depression.
I hope I manage to get the strength to do this... and soon, too.
Thank you all so much *hugs*