there's this boy. . .

[nix-j-c]

i think he's great . . . but he thinks we're just friends. and theres this girl who flirts with him. but she flirts with a coupleof other boys just as much. and they just hve a bit of fun together. but we have meaningful conversations with each other.

i've known him since last august. and at christmas i got him thorntons chocies. but i made an excuse up because i was really shy. and this easter i got him a thorntons easter egg. and he said 'you had a reason at christmas . . . kinda' 'but you havent this time.' and i said 'i knew you like thorntons chocolates and anyways my sister works there so she gives me a couple each easter to give to my friends.' - which is actually a lie because i was to shy to say the real reason. . .

what should i do now?

[Beatrice35]

Tell him how you feel - shy or not shy- what have you to lose truly. If he likes you as more than friends then your wish comes true, yet, if he does not like you as more than friends then you either have to come out of your shell + find ways to impress him or move on + think of someone else/turn your attentions to someone else.
Honesty is always the best policy, too. Good luck, Bea :-)

[Beatrice35]

If you have meaningful conversations with one another then maybe, just maybe the friendship will develop into something meaningful. Good to start out as friends before developing romantically too, btw :-) Take your time.
Deep breaths. If he is meant for you it will happen that you become more than friends. If not then you still have a good friend that is if you can handle just being friends + nothing more. Yet, this experience will benefit you for when you soul mate does come your way if indeed this current friend is not your soul mate- so it is a win win situation. Good luck + stay cool, Bea :-)

[nix-j-c]

but i see him at school and at cadets twice a week. (we're going on the trip in august with cadets.)

but if he's worked it out already do you think thats why he said are you attraced to me or something.

-----------------------------------

i think this problem is aprtly on my childhood sweetheart thread if people ar reading this and only getting part of the problem.

[nix-j-c]

i have a idea.

theres a girl at cadets that think me and him realy fancy each other. but i'm quite good friends with her.

i don't want to be sneaky but . . . what if i get her to come up to me and him when we are talking and get her to say 'you to are spending a lot of time together . . do you fancy each other or something' and i can figure out something to say.

its sneaky but would it work?

[nix-j-c]

and plus if i was going to say something romantic to him i'd probably freeze and go i i i i i i i i . .. . then go bright red and look silly.

[sqad617]

How old are you?

[Beatrice35]

Just be honest when he asks you if you like him more than friends then hopefully he will do some romancing then you can join in ;-) If it is meant to happen it will happen no matter how shy you are! My dad was painfully shy yet lucky for him my mama was not so shy so she bought him out of his shell. He to this day is still more introverted than extroverted like my mama yet they balance each other out perfectly. Yet, my dad surprised me at my wedding + did quite an eloquent speech :-)! Good luck + keep calm all will be well whatever happens with your friend. Just be honest + be your good self. Bea :-)

[nix-j-c]

i'm 15 he's 14 (in the year below).

but he's just so perfect i don't want to lose him or spoil it by saying i love him too soon.

[sqad617]

nix....don't push in any particular direction as it will all evolve in one particular way given time.

[nix-j-c]

should i find out when his birthday is so i can give him more chocies?

if he's already 14 then his birthday is between september and april.

[Beatrice35]

You do not have to say you Love him. Just say you like him as a friend yet only deeper- or something like that, in your own words naturally. The L word( Love) can scare young men sometimes so tread careful. Just let him know that you are keen on him, quite simply. You are still very young- so please please take it easy/slowly if this does develop into romance. Do not be in a rush to be an adult too soon. Enjoy your youth whilst you are a youth yet responsibly.
Bea35 soon to be 36 ;-)- Old enough to be your mama :-)

[Beatrice35]

Good luck nix-j-c. Must go now as need to leave PC + have much to do. A busy bee! Let me know how it all goes + keep your glass half full not half empty please. Ciao for now, Beatrice35 soon to be 36 ;-), a happily married dynamic optimisit ;-)

[nix-j-c]

should i worry about the other girl?

what if she stops flirting with the other boys and goes for him?

oram i just being to pesamistic and thinking of the worse case scenario?

plus he keeps saying his life sucks and he seems upset a lot( i know why but would rather not say) and i feel like saying its alright i can make it better.

[nix-j-c]

whats should i say if he says what do you think of me

thats the random kinda thing he says? he said it a few weeks afetr i met him and then i said i think your sweet and clever.

[zzxxee]

he sounds quite shallow forget him and concerntrate your efforts on going out with your mates and haveing fun

[nix-j-c]

he's not shallow at all.

we have meaningful conversations. about once a week at school we play chess together ( he always beats me ).

we have lots of science trips at school and we both go on all of them - most of which include both our year groups.

we both go to cadets - lots of trips together and we talk before it starts and at breaktime. and long story short -cadets is twice a week he's a higher rate so he teaches me cadety stuff for one of those nights, 2 hours.

and theres some many similarities between us
- both like chess
- cadets
- love of science
- people take the mic because we'r both short
- love of art
- hate of same teachers
-both suport man u.

[nix-j-c]

zzz - i don't get chance to go out with many mates because i live about 5 miles away from them all.

so i can go shopping at weekend and stuff but i can't pop round for half an hour easily.

[Sachs]

nix,
I'm getting all anxious for you! ;0)
Wish I could speed you on a few years, then you could say....
Hey you! Over here! now! xxxx

[nix-j-c]

should i be worried about the other girl??

[nix-j-c]

and if you barely know of someone how can you describe them as shallow.

i wasnt really descriing him anyway to begin with i was jsut telling ABers of the situation.