puzzled?

[marc19985]

i just broke up with my girlfriend of a year and im worried i did the wrong thing because I feel so gutted, would appreciate some advice? Basically my concerns about some of the ways my girlfriend behaved towards our relationship and the complications that seemed to follow her pushed me to take action. Her job involves her living away so we don't see each other a lot, however I have noticed I here from her more when she is lonely and away, when she returns I don't feel she gives our relationship as much attention as she should.
Over the past few months I have noticed her ex contacting her a lot, he speaks to her in a way that suggest they are more than friends, this bothers me and she knows it, still the contact remains strong. I would probably give her the benefit of the doubt but I have discovered she has kept a lot of romantic emails and texts from him (apparently she likes to keep memories) she also recently just moved in with her ex's best friend but failed to tell me (apparently she knew it would hurt me) I have not been introduced to her family yet , but she has suggested, and has met mine countless times. I recently discovered she has lied to me and others quite in-depth about a designer item she purchased, she doesn't know I know its fake but she seems to have convinced her self other wise, this leads me to worry if she lives in denial about something like this, is she telling lies about other things such as the kept emails/texts, does she still have feelings for her ex? I cant help feeling a lack of commitment on her part.

[WiseOldSage]

I would say, in your heart of hearts, that you know that you have done the right thing. You seem to have spent a lot of time analysing what was wrong with the relationship and realised it wasn't what you wanted. The thing I ask for in any relationship, whether it be romantic or whatever, is honesty. My ex used to think that just not mentioning something meant he wasn't actually lying. It takes a while to exorcise ourselves from our exes - even when you move into another relationship - but I think the contact and holding onto "memories" in that way are unhealthy - or at least, not giving a new relationship a sporting chance.

Take your time to get over it because I think it has ended - the right girl is just around the corner

[nolaces]

hi marc,
i too think you know deep down youve done the right thing as it just wasnt feeling right, was it.....
the wrenching feeling thats going on inside of you is because of the loss youre now feeling due to breaking away from the relationship.
its only natural to feel like this, lets face it you no longer have the familiarity, the sharing and all the other nice things that come with being together as a couple.
its a big change for you, and sometimes changes in our lives are difficult to deal with.
at the moment the feeling of being single/on your tod, can feel a bit daunting too cant it, but, youve got mates havent you, i know its not the same, but meet up and go out and enjoy yourself with them a bit.
honestly, i know you might not think it now, but, the saying 'time heals' is very true, and youll see things alot clearer soon once youve adjusted and come to terms with your decision and your new situation.
youll soon feel better marc and youll hopefully realise you did the right thing.
eventually youll feel youre now ready to go out and meet someone new, a nice girl who youll be happy with and feel more content and secure with.
so good luck flower, youll be ok!
and for now try and keep yourself busy if you can so youve not got too much time on your hands to be mulling things over.
take care x