What should I do?

[Simply_Lea]

I started work the other day and I met this guy who works with me. He's really amazing and sweet. When I'd finished work I started walking home and he left work early and came to find me so he could give me a lift home. He also helps me out a lot in the kitchen (we work in a pub kitchen), because I've only just started. I haven't asked him to help me, I didn't ask for the lift, but he did it anyway.
I really like him, but he already has a girlfriend. I was really jelous when I found out because he is just amazing. She is really lucky to be with him and I really wouldn't want them to break up because of me or anything, but I am finding it so hard. I like him so much.
I don't know what to do.
Help?

[redman41]

Take him home to meet your Mother and introduce him as your future Hubby. He'll probably run for the Hills as what he wants is your knickers off ASAP ! LOL

[ummmm]

Well we still don't know that he's doing anything other than being nice.

[bobjugs12]

This is eithe one of two things Lea.
a) He's a nice bloke, who, without realising, has crossed the line. One of you needs to be the adult and agree no lifts, etc.
b) As others have said, he's after a quick fumble with the new girl. If this is the case, don't expect him to ditch his missus for you, and be prepared for rumours circulating about how you threw yourself at him, and went psycho when he refused etc.

Either way, unless you nip this in the bud, you are going to end up looking like a dick. You'll either be the psycho that is throwing herself at the barman, or the tramp who'll get nailed by anything with a cock.
I'm not trying to be harsh, but you sound young and naive, and this is the way the big bad world works I'm afraid.

[rowanwitch]

But surely one should live kindly and not deliberately set out to hurt an innocent third party. Different matter if he splits from girlfriend.....Even then I would wonder if he could be trusted.

[Sqad]

angel 12...in answer to your question, the MAJORITY of people have been cheated on at some time......it's not a modern phenomenon.

[Nosha123]

how can you be sure he is 'AMAZING' when you have only known him a week!!!
He wants to shag you!!! thats all!!!

Harsh but true....

[cazzz1975]

whilst he is in a relationship, I suggest you do nothing and keep in business as usual.

[Sqad]

cazz...bit late for that, my guess is that she has already had sex with him and enjoyed it..............hence "He's really amazing and sweet"

[bobjugs12]

If sqads right and he's already nailed her, then i've got fcuk all sympathy for either of them. Let them both carry on till their world collapses around them for all I care.
I pity his girlf though.

I may be a lot of things, but a cheat or 'the other man' is one thing I ain't!

[rowanwitch]

sqad, I hope not but you may be right.....if not I suspect Lea will do naughties with him....regardless of anything she reads here

[Sqad]

bob.....nicely said.

[cazzz1975]

hmmm maybe, for some women though being amazing and sweet could be a few well aimed compliments and a lift into work..

[bobjugs12]

Sqad, honestly mate, *** to it. It's pathetic and not worth worrying about. I've got more important things to think about than kids shagging. I need to decide whether to go for a poo or not, and whether to watch a DVD on paint drying, or one on grass growing

[Sqad]

Vibes...well said...angel, by your definition, there are some very upmarket "slappers"

[bobjugs12]

Vibes mate, i'm gonna have to disagree with you here dude.
You screw people over on a regular basis and it will come back to kick you in the balls.
Say she decides to go through with this, they get it on in secret for a few months, then it all comes out. Work becomes a nightmare, the ex-gf is devasted, and people look at her like a ***. He loses his GF and maybe his home, work becomes a nightmare, people look at him like a Grade A w@nker.
Who wins? No body. If she is really that smitten with him, and they haven't done anything then just tell him. If he says ok, and ditches his missus then fine, if he says "Do one you crazy little stalker" again fine. If he says "You can be my bit on the side" then he's a pudding. Simple.

Angel, I wasn't agreeing with the idea of doing it, I just think (having reread the posts several times) that she's after support for her being a tart.

[Sqad]

bob...your answer is the correct and logical one.

Where sex is concerned the word "logical" becomes a poor second.