Funeral Attire

[joko]

i have a funeral on friday, and i was talking to some mates about what to wear - i am going to wear black trousers, black shoes, a dark blue top with some decorative stitching across the neckline and a black coat

but one of my friend says you have to wear ALL black,
and another said mostly black but with a pale colour somewhere, such as a lilac or sky blue top or scarf or something is 'correct'
and another said any colours as long as they're dark is fine - such as navy, dark grey, dark brown, but no patterns etc.

all were absolutely adamant that their way was 'correct'

my mum also favours the mostly black and a pale colour thing.

i havent given my clothes much thought other than they should be dark and mainly black i suppose.

now, i know there is no real rule here, and really i could wear whatever i wanted and it wouldnt mean i was not being resepctful, but i was just wondering what others thought of all these 'rules'?

surely peoples clothing - as long as they dont look like theyre off clubbing, or grubby etc - are not that important.

do people get arsey if someone comes to a funeral dressed in what they believe to be against the rules?

what is your 'rule'? does it really matter?

personally i couldnt care less what people wore at mine, or at anyone elses really.

cheers

[emmie]

you don;t have to wear all black, dark colours would be fine, however i know some who don't care what they wear, the more flamboyant the better, that was the wishes of one person i knew who passed away, he liked everyone to be jolly and not sad at his demise.

[murraymints]

does it matter ?...being there is what matters..

[B00]

I think any is fine, as long as you don't look like you've just exited a nightclub, however i'd personally go for the

"any colours as long as they're dark is fine - such as navy, dark grey, dark brown, but no patterns etc, " combo.

[Mick-Talbot]

what is your 'rule'? does it really matter?



No.
I would only notice someones attire if they were dressed as a clown or something similar.

[Barmaid]

I can't honestly say I have ever paid any attention to what someone else has worn at a funeral and thought "they've broken funeral dress code number x". I don't think it really matters as long as it is suitably sober and respectful.

Last funeral I went to I wore a black shift dress, black jacket and black shoes.

[paddywak]

I've a black "funeral" suit which I wear with white shirt and black tie, but I don't really think it matters, you're not there for a fashion show but to show your respect for the deceased and their family.

[McMouse]

An acquaintance turned up at her late husbands funeral wearing a pillar-box red suit. Her comment was that she wanted to celebrate his like and that he would have approved her choice. Good for her.

[boxtops]

You can wear what you like - it doesn't have to be black. My yardstick would be that it's respectable, no bare flesh etc.

[jno]

dark is normal; black is the colour tradtionally associated with death in our culture. (I think it's white in China.) Unless a celebration of the deceased's life is specified, in which case I suppose you dress as for a summer party.

[beckersjay]

Personally I wouldn't wear bright colours unless this was specifically requested but I don't think there's any need to wear black, just sombre colours such as grey. navy blue etc.

[888sally888]

I have told my daughters I DO NOT want anyone wearing black to my funeral!

[rockyracoon]

I go for the darker colours usually, though when my friends dad died I wore a black pencil skirt with a leopard print blouse and shoes, she said he would have absolutely approved. I think a nod towards the deceased is appreciated.

[rockyracoon]

Sally, I've said the same thing, only black on people it suits.

[888sally888]

I want a party feel and a non religious ceremony - hope I get it!

[ummmm]

I tend to wear black. I have funeral clothes!

[zebo]

"do people get arsey?" At a funeral, there's always someone who gets arsey over something in my experience. Don't let the clothes worry you, I don't think there are any rules, it's a matter of paying respect to the deceased.

[sandyRoe]

The fact that you're there is the most important thing.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VAfb1HaZ0Mo

[erin-x]

I don't think there is a specific rule...

I just wear all black because I have a lot of black clothes anyway.

[marval]

My OH says if anyone wears black at his funeral, he will come back and haunt me.

[2sp_]

My Dad specified that no one was to wear black at his funeral. It was a fantastically colourful day, many of the men wore Disney ties including the minister who wore my Dad's favourite tweetie pie tie. We had put "no black to be worn" in his death notice so everyone knew.

But, generally I wear dark, modest clothes. My only coat that fitted me when I was pregnant was kermit the frog green. Mr P's grandfather died when I was 8 months gone, so I had to wear that. No one seemed fussed.