Am I Right To Be Feeling This Way?

renegadefm | 00:19 Thu 26th Dec 2024 | Family Life

45 Answers

Ok this is delicate because I've never experienced it and need sensible answers.

My eldest daughter who is now 20 has been studying in UNI at London, and was soon to finish her courses, and the plan was or so I thought to come back to us in Cornwall soon.

But on her current Christmas visit, which I cherish as the past 3 years I've hardly seen her, she announced shes got a boyfriend who lives in London, actually Wimbledon.

Obviously I embraced her and said congratulations and that I am very happy for you both.

But as a Dad part of me thinks am I slowly losing my daughter rather than gaining her back to me.

Of course I am happy for her, and would never dream of standing in her way, but I feel I've patiently been waiting all this time to look forward to having her back in Cornwall, I'm now not so sure as she might use London as her permanent residence.

Am I being selfish? I can't help how I feel, obviously I want my siblings to be fairly near me, not so far that seeing her is only Christmas or birthdays.

I'm aware theres nothing I can do but is this normal to be so worried that I really am losing close contact with my daughter. I'm not getting any younger myself at 55. I was looking forward to her coming home 😭

If You Had A Twin, But Didn't Realise It.

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pastafreak

Best Answer

My daughter also made the move from home in Plymouth to university in London. She did her Masters, took a year off to move to Australia for a year with her BF for his job, came back and did her PhD in London.Except for a few summers working in Plymouth, she's never been back to stay. I never expected her to.Her experiences made her a strong and independent woman....

12:01 Thu 26th Dec 2024

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DDIL

Could she have gone to Uni closer to home?

pastafreak

How is moving the same as deserting? That's a rather extreme view of naturally occurring stepping stones in growing up. It's not changing your relationship with your daughter unless you allow it too.