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traceyleah1 | 14:25 Wed 10th Aug 2005 | Parenting
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how can i stop my nearly 3 year old son from messing my house up everyday from the moment i get up til i go to bed all i do is clean up after him and its getting to much for me as i have a 11 month old 9year old and 15 what can i do


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The only thing that stands out to me is that possibly he's not getting the attention he needs through no fault of your own, juggling 4 children and trying to give them equal quality time is difficult especially when two of them are too young to fend for themselves. You could assign areas of the house for various activities e.g the sitting room books and t.v. only, dining room/kitchen drawing, colouring etc and larger toys in their bedrooms or garden.

Have you also tried to get him involved with the cleaning? you could make this a game for him which will keep him occupied and he'll be getting lots and lots of praise and attention.  Also maybe there is someone in the house who could take your youngest child off your hands for a short period of time each day so that just you and your son have a little time together alone.  

We sing the "Clean Up" song at certain points during the day, and have junior pick up toys. For example, mrs rampart might say, "Let's go have something to eat!" then break into the Clean Up song. They'll clean up the toys then off to the dining room to eat. Same at nap time and bed time. Works fairly well. At age 3, you may not have complete success. Still, this is a good age to start teaching the things you want your toddler to do. Sooner or later, it will become routine and not a struggle.

Good luck!

Not sure I entirely agree with Lore. My eldest son (who of course had my complete attention, all day every day) would sweep books off shelves and empty every cupboard and drawer which which he could open (which got fewer and fewer and we put more and more cupboard and drawer locks on!). Every time we went to his Grandmas she'd tie up her kitchen doors with string to stop him getting in, though she did let him have access to the tea towel drawer (nothing to hurt himself with in there!). Yet my younger son NEVER swept books off shelves or showed the slightest interest in emptying cupboards and drawers, even at Grandmas where there were no locks.

It's probably not what you want to hear, but I just had to wait for my son to grow out of it. I also never picked up the books etc more than twice, after that they would have to stay on the floor until he'd gone to bed!
I certainly agree with what Lore says here:

"Have you also tried to get him involved with the cleaning? you could make this a game for him which will keep him occupied and he'll be getting lots and lots of praise and attention. Also maybe there is someone in the house who could take your youngest child off your hands for a short period of time each day so that just you and your son have a little time together alone."

We do this with my daughter who is 3 in November but we only do it at the end of the day usually before she goes to bed. We get her involved in the cleaning and make it into a challenge and says things like "Let's see if you can put all those bricks away before mummy tidies the books up" - sometimes mummy wins but sometimes mummy loses on purpose!

She always marches downstairs in the morning - looks through into the lounge and says proudly "Look mummy! I tidied the lounge last night and its all nice and clean!".

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