Friends problem

[Fiszi]

I have a very close friend who I don't want to hurt but he is going down a bad path at the moment and getting me into trouble. He doesn't mean to do it. He has a girlfriend but she lives far away and now he's sort of seeing a barmaid that me works with. They go up to his room in the evening and smoke drugs together. Only I'm always left to cover with his girlfriend and say this barmaid is more my friend that his and the drugs are mine although I never even touch the stuff. I don't know whats got into him. I'm scared I will get sacked and banned from the hotel. The atmosphere is becomming increasingly uncomfortable. His girlfriends dad is a police officer and they live just around the corner from me. I don't know if I should say anything but I know if he finds out it's me thats the end of our friendship and he's normally the one person I can rely on.

[Theland]

He needs to be a good friend to you, as well as you being a good friend to him. At the moment he is obviously just using you.

Draw the line. Tell him, no more compromising favours. Do you want to risk getting a police record, and compromising your honesty and integrity for somebody who behaves like this?

Friendship is a two way thing.

[helster]

You should definitely say something. he's treating you with a total lack of respect and it needsto stopbefore you get into trouble. i would say something to him or someone else before it's too late and you're in something you can't get out of.

[raysparx1]

Fiszi, He is taking advantage of your friendship.tell him to stop it now, what would he say if the place was raide and drugs were found ? oh mr policeman they are mine, I don't think so do you ? knock it on the head now before it gets serious,this is not friendship.he is using you,

[fayelc123]

I agree with the Theland, if this was my friend i'd tell him that i'm not gonna lie for him anymore & if the girlfriend asks you questions just say you don't know or you don't want to get involved.
If he wants to end your friendship after that then that's his choice but personally i wouldn't want a friend like that anyway if that's the case.

[WendyS]

This friend is not a true friend of yours. He is simply using you as a very convenient scapegoat and if you don't want to be tarred with same brush you must get yourself out of this situation very quickly. You have already recognised this and are to be praised for looking for solutions. It seems to me you have three options.
1. Tell your friend you will no longer cover for him.
2. Ttalk to the manager of the hotel where you work and be completely honest with him about the situation in which you find yourself? You may lose your friend in the process if he gets sacked but isn't this better than being sacked yourself, or even finding that you subsequently get picked on by the police for a crime you haven't committed?.
3.Ring Crimestoppers on 0800 555 111 and report his drug use. This is a totally anonymous telephone number which members of the public can use to report crime and related information.

And please don't delude yourself that this is the one person you can rely on. You can't. He is just using you and if you can't distance yourself from you he will eventually drag you down with him. Will he still be your friend then ?

[Fiszi]

I understand that the way he is treating me is really bad but he's never been like this before. He was lovely and would never dream of using anyone till he started seeing this barmaid behind his girlfriends back. I want to find a way to help him. To make him stop and realise what he's doing before he gets into serious trouble. I thought if his girlfriend found out and it coused problems there it would be enough to kick him into quitting and get back to his normal self. After all, even if she leaves him its better than him getting in trouble with the police. He used to be the most honest and trustworthy person I know to the point where it was stupid. He'd tell people things they really didn't need to know because he was so honest.

[bloaterbum]

tell him when he can treat you like a true friend you will do like wise until then On Your Bike mate

[joko]

i wouldn't report him. just tell him the score, put your foot down - he only does this because you let him and he may not realise that it bothers you.

I once knew a couple who thought it was fine to have full on violent slanging matches in my house, as well as generally take liberties - simply because they claimed they would have let me do it in their house!

so some people have a weird idea of what is acceptable - he may well think "well i'd do it for you"

[BBWCHATT]

Fiszi - you are no longer dealing with the friend you knew honey, you are dealing with the drug now. Drugs don't have loyalty, or honesty or devotion - they are totally selfish and will use you and everyone else they come in contact with. The best thing to do is safeguard yourself - and if your friend is ever ready to clean up his life, be as supportive as you can without jeopardizing yourself. He needs the kind of help now that can only be given to him by a professional - and even they can't help until he is ready.