Smacking!

[Lindylou]

I've been watching the news this evening regarding 'smacking' your children. What do you think about this? For myself, I've always felt a good slap (not a battering) immediately after the 'event' is a sensible reaction. Reinforces what is acceptable and what is not. I have three children - all grown up now - and they all had a slap when they deserved it. Guess what? They are all lovely kids, doing EXTREMELY well for themselves, not a tattoo or a piercing amongst them AND they love their mum and dad. Don't think I went far wrong.

[cazzz1975]

my kids are lovely too, doing well at school and confident and happy. its great when that happens lol!!

I didnt smack them though

[weeal]

well, tatoos and piercings dont make kids bad kids though i see your point

some people dont know where to draw the line tho with a smack, if all these rules were as rigid when I was young i may have been left fatherless!!

[Psychick]

I will admit I have in the past had to resort to smacking my daughter. By smacking I mean one smack on the leg, just hard enough to make her realise she has done wrong but not hard enough to really hurt. This has always been a last resort when has continued to be naughty after being told off repeatedly. I am pleased to say this is now an extremely rare thing. (Her being smacked not her being naughty!lol) She definately still has her moments as all kids do. But a telling off works pretty much all of the time now.
I can remember as a kid, if me and my sister played up at bedtime, my mum would bring up her slipper! It didnt really hurt because she always did it over out blankets.........then she got smart to the fact that we would put our hands there!! Never did me any harm though I would never ever take a slipper to my daughter no matter how naughty she was.

[ruby27]

Lindylou
I am sure your children are a credit to you, but thats because of the whole package you provided isnt' it.

With smacking, would you consider it a helpful way of teaching an adult - and if not why not?

[Goodsoulette]

Well I was smacked and I have lots of piercings and tattoos but then I don't grade kids on how well they are turned out by how they modify their bodies.

I have 2 lovely boys. There is no shouting or smacking in my house. It's bang out of order, smacking only teaches children that smacking is A okay. It used to be ok to hit your wife, as long as what you were hitting her with was no thicker than your thumb. I don't like being shouted at and wouldn't like being smacked much either, so I wont do that to my children. I know friends who smack their kids on the hands or backside and it achieves nothing, they still do it again and they have learned to smack. Achieves nothing.

[aims1202]

Good point ruby27 I wouldnt smack an adult, but some people do!
I could never smack my children, i just know i wouldnt be able to hit them no matter what they do or how angry i am.
Im sure the odd smack doesnt do any harm if the children are loved and feel secure but a children who are smacked are more likely to be violent themselves. Young children copy their parents and will learn that you hit when you dont like what others do.

[Ice-Maiden]

I don't think there's any harm in a light slap if a child repeatedly does something naughty or dangerous, but there are better ways of showing your disapproval. Children usually learn by example, and there's no better way of teaching them how to behave than setting the pattern yourself.

[warpig3]

I am not sure there is a right or wrong with this, its more just up to the individuals choice. I was smacked as a child (perhaps more than was necessary but thats another story) and I have never raised my hand to anyone as a teenager or an adult. Certainly there were childhood spats with siblings and friends but I doubt this was in any way related to being spacked by my parents.

It could be a no win situation, for example:

I smacked my kids and they grew up fine = smacking works
I smacked my kids and they grew up bad = thats because they were smacked
I didn't smack my kids and they grew up fine = thats because you didn't smack them
I didn't smack my kids and they grew up bad = thats because you didnt smack them

A very simplified example I admit but there is no right or wrong answer, just what you feel yourself.

[meltoadhall]

I smacked mine when they were younger , they are well behaved and fairly obedient. We have few discipline problems as they are older now and I dont remember the last time I needed to smack any of them.
I've been complemented on them wherever we have gone as a family so i dont think it was a problem and have no regrets for smacking them.

[jake-the-peg]

Smacking children certainly teaches them something.

It teaches them that hitting people when you are angry is OK

[Pippa68]

Spot on, jake.

[miacat]

It's a bit like saying DON'T SHOUT! Lead by example......?

[Reverandfunk]

Just out of interest, if you had a child of 3 and they are continually naughty how do u reprimand them?

[4getmenot]

when little if they go near something they shouldnt a lottle smack on hand should be used as a shock factor. I feel as they grow up and can understand things a bit more a good telling off will sufice. I was smacked when little and has done me no harm. alot more spoilt little brats about nowadays as that get away with too much

[confused79]

I was smacked and it never done me any harm, although now i tend not to resort to smacking, i use a naughty mat and when ever any of my three are mouthy, rude or hit each other they spend how ever old they are in minute, however i tend now to just use this method on my youngest who is 6, my older two who are 8 and 11 i take away privledges, my oldest loves Eastends and at the moment in fact he is banned from watching it for a week and he hates it when i ban him, i have smacked him in past and i can say from comparison the taking away privledges works better by far.

[confused79]

I have a step son of almost 3 and he sits for 2 minutes on naughty mat and he hates it but doe snot move when he is on there, then has to say sorry for whatever it is he has done,

[China Doll]

I can count on the fingers of one hand how many times I've been smacked in my life by my parents. I'm now 28.

With the exception of one the time it was always because I was about to pour boiling water over myself, stick my fingers in the plug socket/toaster etc... (What can I say? I was a child with a death wish!)

In instances of imminent scalding or eletrocution I think it's justifiable.

But not just because you've lost control.

[andrea81]

I have smacked my little boy on his hand when he was naughty, it did nothing! To be honest he started slapping children in his class!

Only think works is a nughty step and a reward chart for him. It's a personal thing, it didn't work for him that is all, not sure if I think it's a good idea concidering how he thought it was ok to smack his friends!

[Reverandfunk]

Personally speaking when at school I got the leather strap accross both hands a couple of times and that did more good than 100 detentions ever could.

However due to the amount of dimwits who are parents a smack on the hand or accross the back of the legs is taken out of context.