Teenage Pregnancy

[one_mad_cow]

I am a pregnant teenager and quite frankly I'm sick of the dirty looks I get from people on the street.  Why do so many people judge on how good a parent you will be by the years you have been alive?  I have a good, stable job, a steady boyfriend and my own house.  NOT council.  Why is it so important to people to look down upon the next generation?

[Miss Zippy]

I expect because you�re young, middle-Englanders (aka Daily Mail readers) automatically assume that you�re going to sponge off the state and end up having five kids by as many different fathers!   You and your partner pay your way in society, so stop worrying about what others think. It was only a couple of generations ago that it was the �norm� to be married and have children young.  When my mum had me in the 70s at the grand old age of 26, she was considered an �older� mother by all her friends (who were all married before the age of 20 and remain married)! Fortunately, (for someone like me anyway), expectations have shifted, but for some people having a family young is right for them.

[one_mad_cow]

Thank you for all your answers, they definitely lighten my day at work!  I'm 3 months gone and have my first scan a week on Monday, although I'm only this small amount of weeks my bump is at least 3-4 inches out from my body!  I hope I don't have twins!!!

[bradleyy]

You had injections AND used condoms then fell pregnant. Please!!!!!! This I do not believe. That is basically 99.999% protection. 

[PunkDaddy]

It's not about your opinion bradleyy. Glad your excited  one_mad_cow. It's hard work like but well worth it in the end, the scan is amazing, really brings it home.

[one_mad_cow]

Bradleyy all forms of protection are 99.9999999% but there is still that small chance, things happen for a reason.  I believe this is a good thing, although after having this baby I shall be having the coyle put in!!!

[jills]

one-mad-cow ......enjoy the scan, hope all goes well.  Let us know if it IS twins!! xxxx

[dirtyharriet]

Congratualtions on your pregnancy and all the best for you,your partner and your unborn baby.

Having become pregnant myself when I had a coil fitted I do know this can happen. Isn't it amusing how the 2 posters who have condemned you for "inadequate contraception" are men? Every woman knows that NO contraception is 100%.

I can empathise with your feeling of being judged but unlike you I was a "scum of the earth single parent on benefits" You have nothing whatsoever to justify to anyone else. From what you have said, you are a mature, responsible woman. Good luck to you.

[Gevs1966]

In response to dirtyharriet not all women know that No contraception is 100% at all. I had to explain that fact to my ex girlfriend. It is a matter of education and ignorance and not a matter of men versus women!!

 

one_mad_cow, if you are happy and looking forward to having this baby then why do you even care what other people think, especially if you don't even know them? If you are as mature and level headed as you sound than there is no reason for you to pay any attention to the kind of people who pass judgement so easily.

[dirtyharriet]

Sorry I'm sure!

I thought every woman who goes to a doctor or family planning clinic to get contraception were told about possible cases of failure like diarrhoea and sickness with the pill etc.

[Kingaroo]

ONE MAD COW -- If people are looking at you as if you were an irresponsible teen, or a conniving sponger, perhaps you don't look like a responsible adult. Do you tend toward youthful or faddish clothing and grooming? i'm not necessarily saying you have to start wearing dowdy matronly clothes, but if you want to look like an exceptional teen, think about how you dress.

SMUDGE - You've lived through it, though it was 30 years ago. Did you start dressing more like a Mom, or did you still have a youthful urge to look groovy?

I'd hate for a young mom to feel she had to wear a "costume" to be taken seriously..... but ask any young black man how he is treated when wearing a suit and tie compared to when he is wearing baggy trousers and lots of Bling.

[jills]

Gevs....your ex was clearly thick as mince!!! LOL!

[one_mad_cow]

Kingaroo it doesn't matter what I dress is, I'm 17, it's not my problem if I don't have the face or complexion of a 30 year old woman.  I do feel like a responsible woman and plan to become a great mother, someone who my child can look up to and not be ashamed of.  I have never even thought of wearing these "tracksuit bottoms" with my socks up to my knees over the top!  Most of the time when I am out in public I'm in a suit or a shirt because of work.  I know I have a lot of havoc and chaos to look forward to so I spend my time indoors soaking up my relaxation while I can!!!

As for the 'young black man' remark, the only difference I see when he wears a suit or his "bling" is the fact that he's working or relaxing!  It's not such a big deal on what clothes you wear such as what you personally look like, from facial features and bodily stature.  Since I do not drive round in a Merc or a BMW and am not "suited and booted" 24/7 I therefore have no place becoming a Mum, this is the point I am making.

[Gevs1966]

Jills I would say she was thicker than that which is why she is now an ex!! One of those, looked good but nothing between the ears people!! She was completely shocked when one of her friends got pregnant whilst on the pill and couldn't understand why even though she was on it herself.

 

She obviously wasn't listening when she went to the doctors hey dirtyharriet... ;o)

[xxlizziexx]

so many people are stereotypical ( sorry i cant spell the word ) they think o no a teenager pregnent ooo she got knocked up at some party shes going to be a bad mum etc beacuse sadly, the truth is so many teenagers are like that, well thats happened to them, but it sounds like you really are going to be a good mum you know, it really does, and prove them wrong, its the best way, turn it into something postive, prove them wrong : )

hope this helps xx

[laurentwink]

Hi Mad cow,

my cousin is 15 and has just got preganant, actually its due next month, she wears huge poncohs and baggy shirts and hides from everyone.  her bloke is a WASTER and she lives with her mum (my first cousin) in Romford.  Shes happy though and cant wait to have the babe.

Best of luck to you.  Please let us know when you give birth - and what sex the baby is etc!  I'd like to know everything!

[jills]

Gevs1966....LOL!! (you related to Gevs on here?)

[Gevs1966]

Do you mean Gevs a.k.a Jens Lehmann??

[TTFresh]

Perhaps being only 17 years old people think you are still growing up yourself . 

When we are discussing driving on one thread, about how young and irresponsible drivers are not experienced enough to be taking on something so suddenly in the wake of a crash killing 4 up in scotland, I must confess I find it odd that you are all patting a young girl on the back for having a baby.

I am taking nothing away from you and wish you all the best, but when you grow up you'll see that 17 is not the age of a mature, responsible adult even if you may appear so to your peers.

Bad parenting has a lot to answer for in this country

[jills]

YES! Gevs/Lehman...are you one and the same Mr 66?

[jills]

TTFresh not just callous, but insensitive too!!!!  Wow, what a catch you'll be for someone.  Have you posted anywhere else so I can see what other amazing attributes you have???

Getting pregnant without planning it but dealing with it in a mature and responsible way is JUST like passing your driving test and showng off in front of your friends at high speed.  Great comparison of two entirely disparate threads mate.  NLOL.