Do You Think He Has Gone Off Me?

[abbeylee90]

I said I'd make a new thread earlier so like I explained in my other one. This guy I went on a date with 2 weeks ago and as I explained he said he wanted a 2nd we were meant to go out last Friday but he cancelled as he has a cold. He said on Sunday he would let me know if he wants to go out this week but said yesterday he has a cold but also hasn't been messaging me in the morning like he normally would 

[abbeylee90]

Got 3 my parents dogs but on my own I can't when I'm working. I don't want to be like that man who I use to hang out with from dogs home old and lonely 

[Redhelen72]

He didn't sound lonely, he had friends to go out with and 60 is not old.

[abbeylee90]

Yes that it he's a man's man

[Redhelen72]

Yeah you have no idea what that means 

[andres]

Did you ever tell him that you were on Answerbank?

[Neveracrossword]

Abbey, you're young enough yet to turn your life around... it won't be as ...inadequate as this for ever! And who knows, maybe one day a man will come along...

[abbeylee90]

Yes I guess so just need to move out

[Neveracrossword]

I think you need a few things before you move out - a decent job would be the first thing to address!

[lankeela]

You cannot afford to move out.  You don't even have a full time job so how could you get the money together for a deposit/rent and then pay all the bills as well? What difference do you think moving out will make to you finding a man?  

[Barsel]

Abbey, why don't you start another thread entitled, 'Should I move out?'

[scorpiojo]

Oh please no

[newmodarmy]

I think a new thread will be a better idea than to tag it onto this one- on condition you don't keep bringing up the man's man from the dog home.

But before you start a new thread you should discuss it with your parents and your doctor as to whether you're likely to be able to cope with looking after yourself in view of your mental/dyspraxia/ASD issues, and that's on top of the financial issues. It seems to me that you're some years away from being able to support yourself emotionally and financially.

 

[Neveracrossword]

Abbey's chances of moving into a place of her own are probably around 0.05%. I'm sure she knows that 16/17 hours of paid employment is nowhere near enough to cover rent...and I expect she's aware (possibly through her friends) that substantial deposits are required. 

PS A grounding in reality is needed to offset 'just need to move out'. 

[lankeela]

Sadly I suspect 'reality' is what is lacking in Abbey's vocabulary.

[newmodarmy]

I agree. I doubt anything we say or advise will be taken on board.

[abbeylee90]

I get all that even 30 hours per week is not enough to live on my own. Having no money and unstable job is playing with my mental health 

[Neveracrossword]

Yes, Abbey, you're maybe now regretting many of 2023 decisions (all the rubbish and/or part-time jobs), but there's nothing to stop you making a better go of 2024... I'm sure you'll be taking no more 'unstable' jobs, you seem determined now to get full-time work. Hope that goes well.

[abbeylee90]

Yeah determined for full time and suitable job

[Barsel]

Neveracrossword, when I read //you're maybe now regretting many of 2023 decisions // I thought you meant the number of decisions before I realised you meant the year.

 

[Neveracrossword]

Good, stick with that way of thinking, Abbey.