i can sympathise, my dad has the same problem with my younger brother. my brothers mum doesn't actually want my bro around but uses him to get to my dad. i no its hard but u have to think of d kids. we basically keep her sweet so that we have access, he needs normality which e gets from us n not her. when there a little older n can choose who they want to say it different but for d mean time, keep her happy n she'll prob give u plenty of access, as and when she wants it as she wont be paying babysitters