i can see exactly where your coming from, and yes it does haunt u for years. I too am married to a decent guy now, but i still cant shake it off. have arguements with myself " get over it" but its not that easy. I guess alot of it is anger because the ex took the pi** in the first place and we were dippy enough to fall into it. (im waffling) I keep my husband on a very short leash, luckily , he's kinda cool with that but i dont think its healthy. I guess its all down to time. Times a great healer. Plus they have to earn your trust, and we ladies gotta wise up and not take thier crap. lol helped atall ?