Crosswords3 mins ago
splitting up with girlfriend... a debt question.....
9 Answers
hi all
I was wondering if anyone can give me some advice. I have been with my girlfriend for nearly 5 years and we are breaking up. Basically we arent really right for each other, I have a little boy from a previous relationship and she has struggled to cope with it due to the fact she doesnt like kids. We both live together, however its her house and the mortgage is in her name. We hit abit of difficulty financialy 2 years ago and ended up getting a secured loan in both our names to sort out some debts. Now, the loan was for �28,000 which she had racked up around �10,000 in credit cards much to my disapproval but she insisted she could cope untill she cracked and admitted she couldnt. We both have seperate banks and have our own money, things just got out of hand. Anyway, we both got this loan, �10,000 for the card debts, about �15,500 for some home improvements and the rest went to a few other things. Now, I never benefited in this money in any way. I soley added my name on the secured loan to help her get it to sort the finances out. Because we are breaking up, she has informed me that I am liable for repaying half of this loan which im a little gutted bearing in mind all i saw myself was a name on the paperwork to help her out. After xmas time I took a massive paycut at work and lost just under half of my monthly pay. Im struggling to cope as it is, Im only just managing. I have to move out which is more cost's I cant really afford, once I'm moved and in my own rented place there is no way I can afford to repay the loan. However, she insists its my problem. Im very worried now because I may have to declare bankrupcy which will finish me off, I will loose my car which I use to visit my son who lives 40miles away and I bring him to stay with me at weekends, I also use it to get to work.
I know it was my stupid fault for adding my name and agreeing to this, but I never thought we would end like this.....
I was wondering if anyone can give me some advice. I have been with my girlfriend for nearly 5 years and we are breaking up. Basically we arent really right for each other, I have a little boy from a previous relationship and she has struggled to cope with it due to the fact she doesnt like kids. We both live together, however its her house and the mortgage is in her name. We hit abit of difficulty financialy 2 years ago and ended up getting a secured loan in both our names to sort out some debts. Now, the loan was for �28,000 which she had racked up around �10,000 in credit cards much to my disapproval but she insisted she could cope untill she cracked and admitted she couldnt. We both have seperate banks and have our own money, things just got out of hand. Anyway, we both got this loan, �10,000 for the card debts, about �15,500 for some home improvements and the rest went to a few other things. Now, I never benefited in this money in any way. I soley added my name on the secured loan to help her get it to sort the finances out. Because we are breaking up, she has informed me that I am liable for repaying half of this loan which im a little gutted bearing in mind all i saw myself was a name on the paperwork to help her out. After xmas time I took a massive paycut at work and lost just under half of my monthly pay. Im struggling to cope as it is, Im only just managing. I have to move out which is more cost's I cant really afford, once I'm moved and in my own rented place there is no way I can afford to repay the loan. However, she insists its my problem. Im very worried now because I may have to declare bankrupcy which will finish me off, I will loose my car which I use to visit my son who lives 40miles away and I bring him to stay with me at weekends, I also use it to get to work.
I know it was my stupid fault for adding my name and agreeing to this, but I never thought we would end like this.....
Answers
Best Answer
No best answer has yet been selected by lincsguy. Once a best answer has been selected, it will be shown here.
For more on marking an answer as the "Best Answer", please visit our FAQ.There is unfortunately no such thing as just 'a name on the paperwork' - you are liable for the loan - indeed potentially the whole of it if she defaults and the loan company sees you as an easier target.
However you say it's a secured loan? What on? If it's the house that is solely hers (you didn't sign to be joint mortagee as well did you??) that makes it more difficult for her to default without losing the house. There may be a way out of it for you somewhere there.
However you say it's a secured loan? What on? If it's the house that is solely hers (you didn't sign to be joint mortagee as well did you??) that makes it more difficult for her to default without losing the house. There may be a way out of it for you somewhere there.
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Have you been paying anything on this loan yourself, or has she made all the payments?
Legally you are "jointly and severally liable" which means they can come after either of you for the full amount. Do not be taken in by her telling you it is your problem - it isn't, unless the lender decides to chase you. And, as others have said, as the loan is secured on her house it is much more likely they will chase her.
You say you are very short of money and will have extra costs - rent etc. Any debt of this nature should - so far as you are concerned - be treated as less important than your essential living costs. Perhaps the best solution at present would be that you just don't make any payments yourself and tell her that. If the lender contacts you you will need to give them an income and expenditure statement (showing your finances after you have moved out) and a payment offer - even if it is only a nominal �1 per month. You also tell them the debt is secured on her house and they should look to her and their security.
You may well end up with a bad credit record if the loan is defaulted so it would be better to secure your rented property (credit checks are often done by agents) before that happens.
Legally you are "jointly and severally liable" which means they can come after either of you for the full amount. Do not be taken in by her telling you it is your problem - it isn't, unless the lender decides to chase you. And, as others have said, as the loan is secured on her house it is much more likely they will chase her.
You say you are very short of money and will have extra costs - rent etc. Any debt of this nature should - so far as you are concerned - be treated as less important than your essential living costs. Perhaps the best solution at present would be that you just don't make any payments yourself and tell her that. If the lender contacts you you will need to give them an income and expenditure statement (showing your finances after you have moved out) and a payment offer - even if it is only a nominal �1 per month. You also tell them the debt is secured on her house and they should look to her and their security.
You may well end up with a bad credit record if the loan is defaulted so it would be better to secure your rented property (credit checks are often done by agents) before that happens.
thanx al for your comments and I will be taking the statements above into consideration.
Yes I gave her money towards the mortgage and bills, we literally split all the outgoings down the middle and shared it equally. Its saddened me that its come to this, I feel all the hard work and commitment I have done in the past 4 or so years has accounted for nothing now....
I feel a broken man.....
Yes I gave her money towards the mortgage and bills, we literally split all the outgoings down the middle and shared it equally. Its saddened me that its come to this, I feel all the hard work and commitment I have done in the past 4 or so years has accounted for nothing now....
I feel a broken man.....
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I agree with vibrasphere. Do you have any of the paperwork for the loan? I recall a friend doing the same as you but he and his partner because "tenants in common" on the property and when they split he could have forced the sale as they held the property 50/50 as well as the debt. Your ex may realise this and she may well be trying to bluff you. Do you recall dealing with a solicitor? It may be worth ringing the loan provider for clarification.
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