Child at risk

[johnnyedge]

Hi, I would like to know what my options are for the following situation.
I have a son approaching 6 months old, myself and his mother split up prior to his birth, after he was born he spent the first seven weeks of his life with his mother, however, due to her life style and having no permanent address I decided he would be better cared for living with myself at my parents address.
This situation was working well, my son became more settled and his mother was able to continue her socialising without the constraints of a baby to keep her in, the mother was given access from day one providing she was sober, and up until today has always returned him to my address as agreed.
Today however, she decided that she would not be returning my son and that she was taking him into her care, however, she still has no fixed address and is sleeping at a friend’s house, the police have been to the address on my request to recover my son, however, they have informed me that because he appears fit and well and there are responsible adults in the house that they were powerless to act and he will be remaining with the mother.
The mother has a record of alcohol abuse and has also dabbled in class “A” drugs, since May of this year she has had approximately 8 different address as people find it hard to tolerate her drunken ways, in that time she has also had numerous sexual partners and relationships none of which last for very long.
I’m sure you can see my concerns, I do not wish my son to be exposed to this lifestyle that she continues to enjoy, I fear for his wellbeing and as much as the police understand the situation and are very empathic they are unable to act until she makes a mistake, this unfortunately might be at my sons expense.
Could you please advise me what my options are, I will also add that I am at present going through the process with my solicitor of obtaining a residence order for him to live with

[cassa333]

Tit for tat... Go and take the child back and go and seek a custody order (or whatever it is called) with the child in your arms. Even if you have to take him/her to a solicitors with you do it the minute you walk out of her house.

Whether your allowed to do it I don't know but I would give it a go.

[terambulan]

johnnyedge.......with this mother's history, that you so disapprove of, why did you impregnate her? Are you not just as irresponsible?

You have no rights on the baby unless you are wed to the mother. Because of your neglect, another babe is at risk!

[Ethel]

That is not true. If you are named on the birth certificate you have equal parental responsibility, whether you are married to the mother or not.

This has been the case since 1st December 2003.

So, if your name is on the birth certificate, fetch the child home

[Panic Button]

With all the stuff in the papers I would have thought social services would be terrified of another Baby P style witch hunt.

Would you therefore not be wise to explain all your concerns about the situation to them?

[samt1985]

i have a friend who has just been and registered the birth of her baby. if u and the mum are not married does the baby have your surname or hers? according to the person who registered my friends baby as the baby has the dads surmane he has full parental resposibility as they are not married.

[themas]

Ethel's post on this is correct. The surname does not matter - the birth has to have been registered jointly with the father's name on the certificate.

If your solicitor is taking this to Court for a residence order I assume Social Services will be involved - especially if your ex contests the application. Make sure your solicitor is fully aware of what has happened and push him to get it to Court with minimal delay.

[danchip]

it was in my local paper last year about a guy who tried to get custody and failed, he went to a loal drug dealer bought a large amount of class A drugs went to pick his son up on the agreed day and planted it in the mothers house, left the house with the kid and on the way down the drive reported her to the police as being a drug dealer, police busted the house arrested the woman and he got sole custody of the kid.

an option if you get desperate

[crazybaby]

i dont know to much but if you are taking it further it would be a gd idea to get back up on the way she acts when drunk a simple signed address list or even reports on her may help

[Martiens]

Danchip has got a great idea! You had your fun, no matter what her lifestyle is... Personally I think it was a huge mistake getting into bed with her, but we all make our mistakes... You sound as if you want to do the right thing now. Try and get witnesses of her behaviour and or some film footage. Hit social services with their Baby P blunder and take the whole thing to court.., or go Danchip's way! Wish you the best and remember a child is a lifelong commitment! Dont mess around again!