Is my ex-husband entitled to much at all?

[NikJak]

I am almost at the end of 2 yrs separation and will want to file for divorce in the new year. When I met my ex-husband I had my own house which has stayed in my name and I have paid the mortgage on it 100% as he hardly ever worked. He sometimes claimed to be ill to avoid work, sometimes called himself a house-husband but actually spent so much time at the pub I still had to use childcare for our daughter and pay for help at home. I could have filed before now for unreasonable behaviour but would prefer to remain as amicable as possible.
Will he be entitled to any of my house or my small pension from my old job of 20 years? I now run my own business but this was only recent and so is "safe" from him my accountant assures me. It just makes me feel sick to think I could have to pay him off with money that would be essential to bring up our daughter and he would spend at the pub if he had it! I've read back and it sounds like I'm some high-flyer, I'm not, I just work really hard to keep a roof over our heads and food on the table and I'm terrified that he might benefit from it at our expense. He pays occasional maintenance and if I went thru the court or to CSA he would simple stop working and I'd get nothing.
I was hoping to do the divorce myself but maybe that is a bit ambitious in the circumstances. Does anyone have a slant on this?

[hc4361]

How long were you married? Is he your daughter's father?

[NikJak]

We were married for 5 years before we separated and yes, he is my daughter's father and she was born during the marriage. I also have 2 boys from my first marriage (I'm not doing it again)!!

[boxtops]

You need to take legal advice - some solicitors will offer you an hour's consultation free, it is worth asking. If I were you I would not attempt to do it yourself - you have the complication that he is obliged to give you maintenance for your daughter. If you can demonstrate that he put nothing into the house then you (IMO) should be OK, he has to have somewhere for your daughter to live until she is 16. Seek advice, don't delay, don't even consider putting in for the 2-year divorce until you know exactly where you stand. Good luck ;-)

[NikJak]

Yes, I will get a free consultation I think. I am happy to forego any forced maintenence for him to just give a clean break and claim nothing. Even if I got a court order for maintenance he would simply stop work and I'd get nothing - he'll only ever pay what he wants to - it's wrong but it's how it is!

[Dezla10]

Going thro a similar thing myself, only that I worked most of the marriage while my wife didn't and the house is in her name. I left with a mountain of debt and am claiming a % of the value of the house. I'm sure many women will say thats wrong but I did pay for the house over 10 years and she has access to substantial funds. Regardless, he will be entitled to something, the court will start with a 50/50 split then weigh up each side, most of it will go in your favour. But I'm sure he can demonstrate he contributed a bit which means he's entitled to a bit. I did my divorce myself with some advice from solicitor to check forms etc. Any financial claim can be sorted separate from the divorce providing its not filed until you've signed for the Degree Nisi so don't get the two issues confused. Also, your business may be safe but the judge could rule (although extremely unlikely based on what you've said) that you have funds in the business available to pay what they decide he is entitled to.

[237SJ]

My friend was in a similar situation. No kids though so that might make a difference. The equity in her house was all hers from previous properties she had lived in. The husband brought nothing. They paid the mortgage between them for the 3 years of their marriage. He then walked out and tried to get half the house. It didn`t work. He only got £5000 out of her which was his contribution to the mortgage while they were together. She had a much better solicitor than him.

[ummmm]

He shouldn't have got that. Paying towards a mortgage is a living expense....we all have to do it. Do people expect to live for free?