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Aplomb............ in The AnswerBank: Jokes
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Aplomb............

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Shaglene | 15:24 Tue 20th Oct 2015 | Jokes
9 Answers
His Lordship was in the study at Downton Abbey when the butler approached and coughed discreetly.

"May I ask you a question my lord?"

"Go ahead Carson” said his lordship.

"I am doing the crossword in The Times and I have found a word I am not too clear on."

"What word is that?" said his lordship.

"Aplomb”, my lord.

"Now that's a difficult one to explain. I would say it is self assurance or complete composure."

"Thank you, my lord, but I'm still a little confused."

"Let me give you an example to make it clearer. Do you remember a few months ago the Duke and Duchess of Cambridge arrived to spend a weekend with us?"

”I remember the occasion very well, my lord. It gave the staff and me much pleasure to look after them.”

”Also”, continued the Earl of Grantham, “do you remember Will plucked a rose for Kate in the rose garden?”

”I was present on that occasion, my lord, ministering to their needs.”

”While plucking the rose, a thorn embedded itself in his thumb very deeply.”

Carson replied, “I witnessed the incident, my lord, and saw the Duchess herself remove the thorn and bandage his thumb with her own dainty handkerchief.”

”That evening the prick on his thumb was so sore, Kate had to cut up his venison from our own estate, even though it was extremely tender.”

”Yes, my lord, I did see everything that transpired that evening.”

“The next morning while you were pouring coffee for Her Ladyship, Kate enquired of Will with a loud voice,

'Darling is your prick still throbbing?'

And you, Carson, did not spill one drop of coffee! Now that is aplomb!”
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Utterly brilliant!
Ha ha love it !
Is that your dog frugal - what an absolute beauty ....
Yes, Viv. Had him at 4 years old as a rescue; he's now nine. He is my fourth German Shepherd. Original owners kicked him out when a baby came along.
He's been chasing balls on the common this afternoon and is now having a post-prandial snooze!
That's your hopes of an OBE gone down the drain, shaglene!
Lucky dog to have found you frugal. I lost mine recently (shepherd/collie cross) and I'm bereft, but am struggling on. Cuddle him for me x
Sorry to hear that, viv. Leaves a dreadful gap in one's life, doesn't it?
Oh yes, it most certainly does.

Sorry to hijack your thread Shaglene.
Lol, very good

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