How To Shower Like a Man

[marval]

1. Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile.

2. Walk naked to the bathroom. If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the 'woo-woo' sound.

3. Look at your manly physique in the mirror. Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt.

4. Get in the shower.

5. Wash your face.

6. Wash your armpits.

7. Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.

8. Make fart noises (real or artificial) and laugh at how loud they sound in the shower.

9. Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.

10. Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.

11. Shampoo your hair.

12. Taste your wife's ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.

13. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.

14. Pee.

15. Rinse off and get out of shower. (What's a floor towel?)

16. Partially dry off. Fail to notice water on floor because curtain was hanging out of bath the whole time.

17. Admire wiener size in mirror again.

18. Leave shower curtain open, water on floor, light on.

19. Return to bedroom with towel around your waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the 'woo-woo' sound again.

20. Throw wet towel on bed.

[Marijn]

That's good ;-)

[marval]

Thank you

[society]

I think most males, boys and men are guilty of # 20

[piggynose]

marval, are you from obamaville?

[marval]

obamaville? no, Milton Keynes. lol

[lardhelmet]

Milton Keynes eh marval? Nice shops!

[marval]

Yes, a good shopping centre.

[lardhelmet]

Used to go there regularly when my daughter was home but now she works abroad I don't get over there quite so often. But she's coming home in September for a couple of weeks, so we're due for some serious retail therapy!

[philkool]

Nice cows they have there moooooooo

[marval]

It is just the place for retail therapy

[lardhelmet]

Oh yes - and cappucchino...

[marval]

Ooh now I want one

[lardhelmet]

In those great big bucket size mugs and chocolate drizzled over the top...

[marval]

I am drooling just at the thought

[lardhelmet]

Sorry - that's mean of me! I'm feeling very decadent tonight as it's gone 11pm and I'm still on here! My friend's taking me into work tomorrow (so I get an extra hour in bed) as my car's going in for its MOT.

[marval]

No need to be sorry, perhaps I will have one tomorrow. Am of to bed now, will probably dream of cappucchinos.

Good night

[piggynose]

why the americanisms?

[lardhelmet]

NIght marval.