Winning definitions from the Washington Post 2012:-
COFFEE, n. The person upon whom one coughs.....FLABBERGASTED, adj. Appalled by discovering the amount of weight one has gained.....WILLY-NILLY, adj. Impotent.....NEGLIGENT, adj. Absent-mindedly answering the door when wearing only a negligee.....GARGOYLE, n. olive -flavoured mouthwash.....BALDERDASH, n. A rapidly receding hairline.....TESTICLE, n. A humorous question in an exam.....CIRCUMVENT, n. An opening in the front of boxer shorts worn by Jewish men.
Inoculatte: Take coffee intravenously when you are running late.
Hipatitis: Terminal coolness.
Osteopornosis: Degenerate disease.
Karmageddon: It's like, when everybody is, like, sending off all these really bad vibes, right? and then, like, the Earth explodes and it's like, a totally serious bummer.