Please Help.

[Mrswjen]

Hi all, I really need some advice 2 years ago I stupidly opend 3 catalouges in family's names, at the time my husband was violant toward me and then was posted to Afghanistan and I was on my own with a 3 month old and a 2 year old. I was so depressed and was also suffering from a compulsive disorder. I am not a Nast person I would give any one the shirt off my back. I don't even know what possessed me to do it, I didn't do it out of mall ace or with at intent to anyone I really don't know why I did it. I have never ever been in trouble with the police and my husband is an officer in the British army, well last week my mother checked her credit file and I was found out which led to her phoning the police. They had a appointment at there house tonight with the police, my mobile started ringing and it was my mum so I answered it and it was the police man, I live in Surrey now but it happened in Essex so he asked if I could come to Essex for an voluntary interview and said did I want a solicitor to which I asked well I don't know I have never been in trouble befor he then said that if I had a solicitor it would take hours and hours and I would be kept in a police cell and if I just came in I would just be caution and I would get it sorted. He said if I told the truth all would be ok if I lied I would go to prison. I am very confused as to why he wouldn't want me to have a solicitor I am glad I am getting punished for what I have done my family don't deserve the hurt and pain that I have caused and I love them more then anything I'm just confused as I was expecting to get arrested and have a solicitor? Any help would be greatly appreciated as my husband and I split two weeks ago due to his infedelity and I am on my own in Surrey with 2 very small children thank you please don't judge me I'm really not a nasty person I was I'll xx

[2sp_]

More devious than sharp, gav!

[magsmay]

1) Everyone, regardless of income, has the right to free representation by a Solicitor when attending a Police Station for Interview and this does not have to be the duty Solicitor - call any Solicitors firm and they will arrange to be there when you are interviewed.

2) A Police Officer is obliged by law to give you their name and number and the Station where they work. If due to panic you have forgotten the Officers name then call the Police Station and explain the situation -I think you may find the police officer does not exist but if they do arrange to go for your interview and take a solicitor with you

3) Unless you have a history of this sort of crime you will not get a custodial sentence (prison). If you are getting Psychological help for your OCD then a letter from your Therapist or GP will help your case.

4) This scenario sounds very suspect but if you are genuine and the phone call was genuine then hiding away waiting for something to happen will do no good to your mental health -you need to go and get this sorted. Please get a Solicitor TODAY

[Mrswjen]

The amounts were 2x150and 1 125 I thik cab is a good idea as they hopefully can shed some more light on things, if this is all a way of making me pay it has worked that and my husband of 6 years cheating on me 2weeks ago and being on my own with the kids whilst he has been away training etc for the last 11 months has really taken a toll on my mental health :( xx

[Mrswjen]

Situation is absolutely genuine I promise you all that and phone call was @ 9pm yesterday xx

[Mrswjen]

Have just spoke to advice line and the lady I spoke to is finding some information out but even she said it doesn't sound right :s

[Gavmacp]

God I was thinking it was thousands. Though I would never put my child through hell for any amount.
I am sorry but for this paltry amount (I don't think any amount would justify the mental torture they have put you through) is to me just pathetic.
I really don't judge people I am a kind of live and let live kind of person BUT your mother is truly one of the worst people I have heard of!!!!!
To think of the consequences of their action over £425 I am speechless!!!!

[rowanwitch]

isn't it illegal to try to obtain money by coercion and to impersonate a police officer?

[lcg]

my advice would be to do nothing in terms of seeking the police out - let them come to you. never, ever go into interview situations without a solicitor - always have representation and it is likely that you can have this for free/duty brief. use your common sense in this matter - it is only a small amount of fraud, so the punishment is not going to be massive. get on with the immediate things going on in your life - i.e. your children and sorting out housing, finances etc. and the rest will take care of itself. nothing bad will happen,i am sure. good luck x

[Mrswjen]

My son goes to nursery on an army. Camp so I am going to txt my mum and say I will have to pull him out because I will get my pass taken away from me of I have anything on my criminal recorded and see what she says, this is all so horrid I have been all over the place and has lost weight and can't think straight and have spent the last week crying and to me and every1 else it sounds like all is not what it seems, If this is fake I will never forgive my mother for this torture :( and if it isn't I will be making a complaint against the officer who phoned me from my mums mobile as he didn't tell me his name or department and that's improper conduct I do deserve to be punished but not mentally

[albaqwerty]

imo you are punishing yourself more than what any legal outcome would or could.

Just ask your mum for the pc's name as suggested by 2sp.

[Mrswjen]

Advice line said its not protocol and they can't imagine things being handled in that way so looks more likely that this is her punishment :( but again they couldn't say for certain that it wasn't true xx

[lady-janine]

there has been a lot of advice given on this thread from some very qualified and experienced people. Read it slowly and carefuly and then act on it. this sounds so cruel for such a small sum. like gav i was thinking thousands and thousands were involved. a few hundred seems like a lot of money to you but in the game of fraudsters and cheats it is not. good luck.

[Mrswjen]

Every 1 has been so helpful thank you, I just hope I find out soon xx

[Gavmacp]

I think pretty soon you will find out this is a load of Bull***T.
On a personal note you are worth a lot more than you think you are!
I think you have many things to deal with and it maybe a long road you have to travel. Have you never wondered where your OCD came from? If you cannot guess it the person that is playing with you!!! (YOUR MOTHER!!!!).
There are plenty of people that can and will help you address your mental health issues, your GP and charities such as Mind. We are far stronger than we imagine we are.
Take Care of yourself!!!!!

[Mrswjen]

Thank you so much, yes it does stem from my mother and the fact that I can never get praise or approval from here, she called me the worst mother she had ever know because I forgot about my daughters dentist appointment. My sister (19) is also the exact same as my mum. When looking back she is the bad mother for not realising when her daughter is crying out for help, my husband is in officer training and I have had the kids on my own for the last 14 months and it has completely exhausted me and not once has she offered to have them for the night so I can rest etc I have been for countless blood tests at the doctors as my body is literally falling apart and I look like the shell of the person I was 2 years ago and she just doesn't care instead she just pies on the criticism. If this is all fake and a way to punish me I will never talk to her again. I'm sick of trying to make her happy and do what she wants me to do that it messed with my head so much my marriage slipped away from me and it has also affected my 2yr olds behaviour at play school. All I have ever wanted from her is to say well done I'm proud of you and that's what has caused my ocpd

[albaqwerty]

I don't know you, but I think it's best if you could try to accept she will never be the mother to you that you are to your children.
Cut all ties with her, she is poisoning you and your life and that of your children.

[murraymints]

You really have to think of yourself and children...you have very low self esteem and this nasty incident on top of your marital strife has robbed you of your confidence too...you need to see your gp....he will be able to open the doors you need to get better...you owe it to yourself as well as the children....you need to put this episode behind you and with professional help move on....you have a future so do not let this vile woman Rob you of it..xx

[Connemmara]

I haven't read the comments but for Gods sake - you only opened 3 catalogues - can the family not forgive you and let you pay when you can. What a waste of police and solicitors time - all I can think they are frightening the poor girl out of mind - if I was judge - I would dismiss the case without a doubt.

[Mrswjen]

I have just questioned my mum about a few things and she has changed her story to they didn't have the interview at home they had it at the police station so a policeman phoned me on my mums phone from the police station :s

[murraymints]

NOW can you see what rubbish she is spouting ???