Notes For Employees

[maggiebee]

Dear Employees:

It has been brought to management's attention that some individuals have been using foul language during the course of normal conversation with their colleagues.

Due to complaints received from some employees who may be easily offended, this type of language will no longer be tolerated.

We do, however, realise the critical importance of being able to accurately express your feelings when communicating with colleagues.

Therefore, a list of 12 new and innovative, "TRY SAYING" phrases that have been provided, so that proper exchange of ideas and information can continue in an effective manner.

1.

Try Saying:

I think you could do with more training

Instead Of:

You don't have a bloody clue, do you?

2.

Try Saying:

She's an aggressive go-getter.

Instead Of:

She's a bloody power-crazy bitch

3.

Try Saying:

Perhaps I can work late

Instead Of:

And when the heck do you expect me to do this?

4.

Try Saying:

I'm certain that isn't feasible

Instead Of:

You having a laugh mate

5.

Try Saying:

Really?

Instead Of:

you for real mate

6.

Try Saying:

Perhaps you should check with the boss

Instead Of:

Tell someone who gives a monkeys no paid for this

7.

Try Saying:

I wasn't involved in the project.

Instead Of:

Not my bloody problem, mate it wasn't me

8.

Try Saying:

That's interesting.

Instead Of:

What the hell are you trying to say

9.

Try Saying:

I'm not sure this can be implemented within the given timescale.

Instead Of:

No flipping chance mate you having a laugh

10.

Try Saying:

It will be tight, but I'll try to schedule it in

Instead Of:

Why the hell didn't you tell me that yesterday?

11.

Try Saying:

He's not familiar with the issues

Instead Of:

He's got his head up his backside again

12.

Try Saying:

Excuse me?

Instead Of:

Oi, you MOVE .