Sexual Assault years ago

[countrybumpkin]

Hi
i was assaulted by my friends husband about 6 years ago.
it was the yard christmas party and i was staying at the farm house where i had been staying for months, but my friends husband ended up coming back who was hammered and not being much of a gentleman that evening to others.
i had got ready for bed then felt someone get in, it was him he immediatley grabbed me, put his hand down my pj bottoms and assaulted me even though saying no, whilst he had me trapped i tried to talk him round saying how much he loved his wife and i dont want him near me (crying at this point) he then got on top pinned me down and grabbed my head so i couldnt move and forcefully kissed me, for some reason he seemed to calm down i didnt know what to do, thought idf screamed he really do it and dont know what else he'd do.
if i tried to run when he moved scared he hurt me.
after 3 hours he fell asleep.
still i struggle with it, i told his wife but i got accused of being a slapper!
didnt report it as didnt think they would believe me.
can i report it now?

[sara3]

you can report it, but you will probably be expected to explain the delay in reporting.

[standian]

Depending on where you live there may be a local sexual abuse advice service - I would suggest speaking with them - for advice about reporting or not, and for support in coming to terms with it. I think the risk might be why you want to report it now - if you want justice then I very much doubt that anything will be admitted or proven or taken forward now which may damage you even more, and if you want to be able to come to terms with it, then speaking to someone (e.g. a rape counsellor) might be more effective than reporting it now to the police.

Good luck

[yogi-bear]

6 years ago and you want to report it now? Why the delay and why now?

Why dont you call a solicitor...explain what happened to them and take some advice as to how to proceed......the call to them should be free, as you are only asking for an opinion......you would have to pay for their time if you make a pre-arranged appointment.

Hopefully some good folk with criminal law experience will be able to advise you also here.

I send you all the very best, and am so sorry you had to go through that awful experience.
x

[standian]

There is also this national helpline - they may be able to advise more or signpost you to a more local service

Rape and Sexual Abuse National Freephone helpline – 0808 802 999 open 12 – 230 and 7 to 930 every day

[yogi-bear]

Good advice, standian :0)

[countrybumpkin]

i don't think i shall report it, but think i need a little help, but feel i'm blowing things out of proportion as i wasn't raped and don't want people to think i'm being pathetic.
Thanks for all your answers, all been really helpful.
many thanks
stacey

[tamborine]

DNA evidence is lost etc but there are plenty of ways to skin a cat.....get him at work/out with his kids etc. You can't be accused of harrassing as that would publicise him taking advantage of you.

Would a new car from him, appease you......not quite blackmail just you getting even.

[Revel]

Yes.However you know it will be your word against his,but if you are prepared for all this then go ahead,no one should get away with that.

[society]

You do realise the first question everyone will ask is... why have you taken so long to come out with this?

[countrybumpkin]

all friends and his friends know vague details about what happened as he and his wife were at same livery yard as me so had see them everyday they eventually moved and he left his wife.
like i have just said i know not much point of reporting it, the only reason for this was to get over it myself, and i'm going to try the counselling and hope it works.