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Mad Over Fifties Club

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nungate | 20:02 Sat 01st Feb 2014 | Quizzes & Puzzles
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Good evening and welcome to the Mad Over Fifties Club. First of all may I take a moment to thank Daisynonna for stepping into the breech and hosting our last meeting down at Daisy's Farm, and I must add, at very short notice too.
The tailcock for tonight is The Winning Post (year of the Horse)
Our hot plate special for tonight is a Buffet of Chinese Food, (well it is Chinese New Year after all) all the Chinese classics are there, and on the pudding trolley, apple fritters, and pineapple fritters! Later on we have Lion Dancers, and in the Home Cinema Room, we are showing a selection of Chinese films, Red Cliff (a personal favourite of mine) Crouching Tiger etc. and The House of Flying Daggers (visually stunning) Of course no meeting of the Mad Over Fifties would be complete without our selection of volly vonts, canopies and horses doovers, or a visit from everyone's favourite local band The Tone Deafs, this week they will be playing a selection of Golden Oldies, and as always the Minstrels will be back in the gallery with their usual Madrigals and toccattas.
Yet again owing to inclement weather the bungee will be out of use this evening, as will the hot tub, (too exposed up on those towers) Down in the cellars, the indoor pool is ready for use, and swimsuits are available for those who haven't brought one (skinny dipping is frowned upon at the Towers) Our library is well stocked with all the latest magazines and periodicals, the latest edition of "Cow Punchers Weekly" has only just arrived!
I must say I missed you all last week, and I was touched to read all of your messages wishing me a speedy recovery, thank you.

A warm welcome awaits all who dare enter these portals tonight.

carriages at midnight.
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Evening your nungateship, nice to see you, hope your feeling better now.
(skinny dipping is frowned upon at the Towers) DOH[i.

For the rifle I have only one prize tonight, a cat thats in the doghouse, sorry make that two prizes, an empty tin of T cut scratch remover !.
[i]Gawd, I'll srangle that bloody cat].
Madame, you neglected to mention my memoir
evening nungate. Thought I should get here early as the weather is dire. Need to dry off.
Also to apologise in advance for my rifle offerings. got fed up of the weather yesterday and went on a hunt.
Each is edible and what you my do if you are being photographed. Numbered so if you win and are not sure I can say what you have won.

1 An ogress who managed West Ham
2 Dr. Foster visited twice
3 Communist jockey
4 Cherish female foal on Welsh Mountain
5 Gorgeous without Open University sulphur
6 Undies lacking female second
7 Heard vessel and handled tennis shots
8 Sounds like pilgrim hospital

A bucket please!
Evening Daisy.
Memoir Igor ?.
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Welcome to you both - is it a safe assumption that your cat scratched the new ... motor perhaps? Honey you're preaching to the choir! I have two sofas, four dining chairs and a chair all shredded!

Glad to see you made it Daisy, it's blowing a hoolie up here, then there's the sleet! Get yourself to the fire and dry off!
Yes Tony sir, I have decided to write down my life story, Madame has been helping me!
At least the cat is sheltered from the weather. Where's Bow Tony?
Igor, how exciting! Will we be allowed to read it? I'll drink to that.
Youv'e got it nungate, somehow our cat Daisy got herself locked in the garage for a couple of hours ( the bonnet was still warm ! ), I opened the garage door and she leapt off the bonnet and flew up the garden and hid, glad I had some T cut in the shed, took me about an hour to get rid of the scratches on the bonnet. Gawd, I could still strangle her though.
If we ever get it finished Madame Daisy. So far all we have done is make a rough
draft of my life until I came to the Towers with Madame's ancestor. I have plans to make it available to my friends and colleagues after that I am not sure
Excellent, Igor, should make for very interesting reading.
Laying in front of the fire, Daisy.
Maybe get it published, Igor ?.
I don't think so, I disapprove of vanity publishing Tony Sir
Thank you for no banana fritters - Lady j (if she ventures out) and I would have to leave.

I am presuming that you are recovering from the Plague, Typhus, Emphysema, whatever......Has Igor been released from his cell?

One half a horseshoe
One buckle no spike
One rein
One Chinese Chopstick (good for any one-armed MoFC ABers)
One Sum Din
One Snake (dead)
One Bird's Nest (Raven eerie)
One Vulture
One Mao Hat (worn by Tse Dung - so it's a bit shittie.
One empty can of Reeb (a Shanghai Beer)
One road sign - No Dogs or Chinese Take-aways beyond this point
One block out of the Great Wall
One Toy soldier from Xian
One plastic antique Buddha
6 cans of CoCi Koala, an Australian fake made in Xiamen
1 Camel's paw half eaten
1 pack of scorpions (good for the gals' sex drive - a Sino-Viagra)
1 pack of oxen and bear penises - for Tony and any other men that enter the hallowed portals of Nungate Towers
1 10ft high sign in Neon saying 歡迎尼姑塔門 Welcome to Nungate Towers


Good for Bow.
So, I have a Familiar Tony?
Tina Brown did a very good job with Vanity Publishing in N-York, Igor.......
Evening DT. Good journey?
No more rein, reign or rain for me.
Fancy the toy soldier though!
Being Chinese N-Year and as to your pusses - Kung Hei Cat Choy.......
Surely not vanity publishing, Igor, I'm sure lots of people would like to read your memoirs.
Yes you have, Daisy !.

Evening DT, that dead snake looks interesting could do with a new belt.
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I had a very bad case of sinusitis, at first I thought it was a cold, alas no it was the sinuses - very painful, couldn't breathe well, had the humidifier going almost 24 hours a day I'm now on a course of antibiotics which have helped enormously - it's really nice having a face that doesn't hurt!

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