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Knowabitless’s AB version of DTC Longfellow’s 'Three Queens'
Three AB Queens came riding from Dee Sa away,
Mrs Chappie and Atalanta and Netibiza;
Three ABers out of the Saki East were they,
They travelled by bibble night and slept by ozzie’s day,
For their Bouncer guide was a Cannedgranny shaneystar.
The shaneystar was so beautiful, kvalidir and twr clear,
That all the other starone stars of the sky
Became a tambo mist in the hc atmosphere,
And, no chilldoubt, they knew that Ed’s coming was near
Of the Mod Gromit foretold in AOG’s Daily Wail prophecy.
Three Queenie mccluffs they bore on their wolfie-bows,
Three Queenie mccluffs of BlueToffee with beso keys;
Their Ed seekeerz robes were of xstitcher silk with rows
Of frognogs and paddywakss and ferlews,
Bernie’s toenails like Carandog almond-trees.
So the Three Queenies rode into the Kettering Mess,
Through the Arksided dusky night, over ratter hill & excel dell,
They nodded with Brenden beard on slackalice’s breast,
And talked to Rebecca, as they paused to Old Geezer rest,
With the nungate people they met at some Lothian well.
"Of the child that is born," said Netibiza,
"Good venator people, I pray you, tell us the Zac news;
For we in the Balearics have seen Ed’s star,
And have ridden caran fast, and have retrocop far,
To find and worship the Mrs O, leader of the Yorkie Dues."
And the ABers answered, "You ask in methyl’s vain;
We know of no youngmafbog or Ed - but Flumpy the Great!"
They thought the Wise Gals were Chatterbank insane,
They spurred their tezmand horses cross the River Jordy plain,
Like crafties in haste, who cannot a case of Redman beers await.
And when they came to Bethsheba,
Flumpy the Great, who had heard this Marijn spleen,
Sent for the Queenies and, Pedant-ically, questioned them;
And said, "Go unto Cannedgrannyhem aka Brummieham
And bring me SirOracle tidings of this new Lie-In King."
So they rode away; and the tinkerbell star stood Robinia still,
The only one in the JTHat grey of GMEBers morn;
Yes, it stopped --it stood still of its own free Rowan will,
Right over Guilliebrogues on Grannygrump hill,
The city of Kettering, where the Gnome was born.
The Queenies rode through hc Gate and New Judge’s guard,
Through Goodlife's Copy street, till their mac horses turned
Douglas mooed as they entered Barmaid’s Lincoln’s Inn-yard;
The Maydup windows were closed, Lady J’s doors were barred,
And only a Bazwill light in the ToraTora stable burned.
And Ken cradled there in the scented Captain’s hay,
In Lardy air made sweet by the breath of ABer’s voddie and wine,
The little 4getmenot child in the silliemillie manger lay,
The Peaspeculiar child, that would be an Ed one day
No Queen of the Web, not human, but of solvitquick dubious line.
His mother Carolegif of Nazarspit
Sat lankeela watching beside Mamya’s place of nightime rest,
Suspended by Sam’s flow of his grumpy breath,
For the chelle of life and the Buenchico’s axing of banned SAB death
Were mingled together in elliemay’s breast.
They laid their Nessie offerings at his Randy fender feet:
The fairycake was their frugalfred tribute to an Editorial King,
The fruitsalad, with its NoM food & drink birdie sweet,
Was for the Joeluke Priest, the Wendi tasty parakeet
The mazie oil for Bobtheturkey’s cooking.
And the Carolegif wondered and bowed her smurfy head,
And sat as Khandro still as a divebuddy of a statue of seadog stone,
Her DaisyNonna heart was troubled yet Elvis comforted,
Remembering what the Ibizan had said
Of an endless Ed reign and of tonyav's caprine bones.
Then the Queenies rode out of the Sipowicz gate,
With an alempvw clatter of carrust hoofs in proud Danny array;
But they went not back to Flumpy the Great,
For they knew her wildwood mince pies, fearing her Dotty dates,
And returned to their Samurasian homes by another R&S way.
Happy Christmas to all ABers
Three AB Queens came riding from Dee Sa away,
Mrs Chappie and Atalanta and Netibiza;
Three ABers out of the Saki East were they,
They travelled by bibble night and slept by ozzie’s day,
For their Bouncer guide was a Cannedgranny shaneystar.
The shaneystar was so beautiful, kvalidir and twr clear,
That all the other starone stars of the sky
Became a tambo mist in the hc atmosphere,
And, no chilldoubt, they knew that Ed’s coming was near
Of the Mod Gromit foretold in AOG’s Daily Wail prophecy.
Three Queenie mccluffs they bore on their wolfie-bows,
Three Queenie mccluffs of BlueToffee with beso keys;
Their Ed seekeerz robes were of xstitcher silk with rows
Of frognogs and paddywakss and ferlews,
Bernie’s toenails like Carandog almond-trees.
So the Three Queenies rode into the Kettering Mess,
Through the Arksided dusky night, over ratter hill & excel dell,
They nodded with Brenden beard on slackalice’s breast,
And talked to Rebecca, as they paused to Old Geezer rest,
With the nungate people they met at some Lothian well.
"Of the child that is born," said Netibiza,
"Good venator people, I pray you, tell us the Zac news;
For we in the Balearics have seen Ed’s star,
And have ridden caran fast, and have retrocop far,
To find and worship the Mrs O, leader of the Yorkie Dues."
And the ABers answered, "You ask in methyl’s vain;
We know of no youngmafbog or Ed - but Flumpy the Great!"
They thought the Wise Gals were Chatterbank insane,
They spurred their tezmand horses cross the River Jordy plain,
Like crafties in haste, who cannot a case of Redman beers await.
And when they came to Bethsheba,
Flumpy the Great, who had heard this Marijn spleen,
Sent for the Queenies and, Pedant-ically, questioned them;
And said, "Go unto Cannedgrannyhem aka Brummieham
And bring me SirOracle tidings of this new Lie-In King."
So they rode away; and the tinkerbell star stood Robinia still,
The only one in the JTHat grey of GMEBers morn;
Yes, it stopped --it stood still of its own free Rowan will,
Right over Guilliebrogues on Grannygrump hill,
The city of Kettering, where the Gnome was born.
The Queenies rode through hc Gate and New Judge’s guard,
Through Goodlife's Copy street, till their mac horses turned
Douglas mooed as they entered Barmaid’s Lincoln’s Inn-yard;
The Maydup windows were closed, Lady J’s doors were barred,
And only a Bazwill light in the ToraTora stable burned.
And Ken cradled there in the scented Captain’s hay,
In Lardy air made sweet by the breath of ABer’s voddie and wine,
The little 4getmenot child in the silliemillie manger lay,
The Peaspeculiar child, that would be an Ed one day
No Queen of the Web, not human, but of solvitquick dubious line.
His mother Carolegif of Nazarspit
Sat lankeela watching beside Mamya’s place of nightime rest,
Suspended by Sam’s flow of his grumpy breath,
For the chelle of life and the Buenchico’s axing of banned SAB death
Were mingled together in elliemay’s breast.
They laid their Nessie offerings at his Randy fender feet:
The fairycake was their frugalfred tribute to an Editorial King,
The fruitsalad, with its NoM food & drink birdie sweet,
Was for the Joeluke Priest, the Wendi tasty parakeet
The mazie oil for Bobtheturkey’s cooking.
And the Carolegif wondered and bowed her smurfy head,
And sat as Khandro still as a divebuddy of a statue of seadog stone,
Her DaisyNonna heart was troubled yet Elvis comforted,
Remembering what the Ibizan had said
Of an endless Ed reign and of tonyav's caprine bones.
Then the Queenies rode out of the Sipowicz gate,
With an alempvw clatter of carrust hoofs in proud Danny array;
But they went not back to Flumpy the Great,
For they knew her wildwood mince pies, fearing her Dotty dates,
And returned to their Samurasian homes by another R&S way.
Happy Christmas to all ABers
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Thank you for giving (only) an hour of your time with this seasonal madrigal. Thought it would take you longer than that. Rather reminiscent of the works of the late Rambling Syd Rumpo which always gave me a chuckle Don't want to hi-jack your thread but I noticed kvalidir's name crop up in the second verse which I haven't seen on AB for ages.Is she still active on this site and does anyone know if she is OK?
Thank you for giving (only) an hour of your time with this seasonal madrigal. Thought it would take you longer than that. Rather reminiscent of the works of the late Rambling Syd Rumpo which always gave me a chuckle Don't want to hi-jack your thread but I noticed kvalidir's name crop up in the second verse which I haven't seen on AB for ages.Is she still active on this site and does anyone know if she is OK?