Not Exactly Jokes................

[Shaglene]

Mary had a little pig,
She kept it fat and plastered;
And when the price of pork went up,
She shot the little ***.
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Mary had a little lamb.
Her father shot it dead.
Now it goes to school with her,
Between two chunks of bread.
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Jack and Jill went up the hill
To have a little fun.
Stupid Jill forgot the pill
And now they have a son.
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Simple Simon met a pie man going to the fair.
Said Simple Simon to the pie man,
'What have you got there?'
Said the pie man unto Simon,
'Pies, you dumb ass' !!
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Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall,
Humpty Dumpty had a great fall.
All the kings' horses,
And all the kings' men.
Had scrambled eggs,
For breakfast again.
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Hey diddle, diddle, the cat took a piddle,
All over the bedside clock.
The little dog laughed to see such fun.
Then died of electric shock.
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Georgie Porgy pudding and pie,
Kissed the girls and made them cry.
And when the boys came out to play,
He kissed them too 'cause he was gay.
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There was a little girl who had a little curl
Right in the middle of her forehead.
When she was good, she was very, very good.
But when she was bad...
She got a fur coat, jewels and a sports car.
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[melv16]

Mary had a little lamb and she kept it a bucket.
Every time the lamb got out.
Tonyav tried to put it back in again.

[scorpiojo]

Mary had a little lamb
She also had a duck
She put them on the mantelpiece
To see if they would f..all off

[zebo]

Hey diddle diddle, the cat did a piddle
All over the bedroom floor
The little dog laughed to see such fun
So the cat did a little bit more.

[cupid04]

LOL, especially like, Hey diddle and Georgie Porgy ;-)

[marval]

Mary had a little skirt
with splits right up the sides
and every time that Mary walked
the boys could see her Thighs
Mary had another skirt
'twas split right up the front
but she didn't wear that one very often

[Canary42]

Jack and Jill went up the hill
And did what they shouldn't oughta
Jill came down
with half a crown
And now she's got a daughter

[marval]

Mary, Mary quite contrary,
watched her garden thrive.
The cops found seed of a rather odd weed.
Now she's doing three to five

[melv16]

Mary had a little lamb.
She couldn't stop it grunting....

[melv16]

Old mother Hubbard went to the cupboard to fetch the poor postman a letter.
When she got there the cupboard was bare.
So they did it without, it was better!

[scorpiojo]

Lol

[1ozzy]

Mary had a little lamb
It's fleece was black as charcoal
Every time it jumped the fence
You saw it's little.....tail.

[lady-janine]

mary had a little lamb
she tied it to a pylon
ten thousand volts went up it's a**e
and turned it's wool to nylon.

[1ozzy]

Roll, roll, roll your joint twist it at the end.
Take a puff.
That's enough
Pass it to a friend