A&E
A man staggers into an A&E with a concussion, multiple bruises, two black eyes and a five iron wrapped tightly around his throat.
Naturally, the doctor asks him what happened.
"Well, it was like this," said the man.
"I was having a quiet round of golf with my wife, when at a difficult hole, we both sliced our balls into a pasture of cows.
"We went to look for them, and while I was rooting around I noticed one of the cows had something white at it's rear-end. I walked over and lifted up the tail, and sure enough, there was a golf ball with my wife's monogram on it - stuck right in the middle of the cow's ***."
"That's when I made my big mistake."
"What did you say?" asks the Doctor.
"Well, I lifted the cow's tail again and yelled to my wife, 'Hey, this looks like yours!"
"I don't remember much after that!"