Confused and sad

[sophie30]

Me and my partner have seperated after being together 4 over 2 years, the reason, his selfishness. I will give you a few examples, he plays in a band and wanted to do 4 gigs, one of them meant he would be out all night, the venue opened at 10pm and closed at 7am, the night before that they were panning to play in newcastle, also 2 gigs in 2 different countrys which would mean him going away for 5 days 4 each gig. I mentioned tht I would like to go to a butlins 80's weekend and he said he would walk if I go and would come back to an empty house! I told him he would have to walk then...he also does athletics and goes away 4 weekends occasonally 4 that. I didnt want him doing all thegigs, especially the ones abroad as last time he went I couldnt sleep the wholetime he was gone, and at the end of the day I want him to be with me...However it all come to a head last weekend and we finished, he moved out. This week I have been distraught, I have cried buckets as I love him very much, I know he loves me too but there was never any compromise, I tried compromising but he didnt want to. We had no contact after he left and I reached a dark point on wednesday, I was so bad, in the depths of despair and it was though my body couldnt take the feeling anymore and I seemed to shut off from what was going on and pulled myself together, although I was still hurting. He has been in touch in the last few days by email, saying his distraught and cant cope, when I dont answer him he tells me it even more, however today I answered a text that said he hadnt cried like this in 15 years and said I dont like to hear that it upsets me, he then said how he couldnt cope, I left it 4 a while and asked if he was ok, he said he wasnt and that he wanted the empty feeling to go away, so I asked what he wanted from me, his reply was, nothing dont worry ill be ok a some poin sorry to bother you again love you, I then said your playing games, he said he wasnt part 2 on its way