Lies...how much is too much?

[kikadoo]

Hey guys,

A questions about lying, liars and how much is too much.

I have been thinking lately about lies (largely due to my partner telling lie after lie about small insignificant things), but do any of you put up with people telling lies? And if so, how much is too much?
Do you one day wake up and think "no more!" or do you just go with the flow?

My partner appears to be a compulsive liar about so many stupid small things. I have got to the point where I am considering leaving him because of it. To me I am at the end of the road. I am going by the good old motto...."if he's lying about this then what else is he lying about etc". Especially since we used to have such an open and honest relationship. We could literally talk about anything and not be offended, disturbed or embarrassed!

I am worried that maybe I am being too harsh and that I should just accept porkies? Even if I challenge him with outstanding evidence he'll still blindingly deny their is a lie anywhere. But on the other hand, I worry i'll one day just either believe anything he'll say or become 'numb'.
He would make a good politician. I'll give him that one!

Is/has anyone been in the same situation?

I can understand telling a few porkies but like i said, its got to the point where its just too often.

How much is too much?

Thanks all, for the help in advance! x

[sara3]

personally, one lie is one too many for me. if I catch someone out lying, I wouldn't know when to believe them.

the question is.. why is he lying to you?

[cherrychapstick]

well i don't like lie actually hate them no matter what how big or small ,so 1 would be to much for me .

[Rev Sermon]

I have x-ray eyes which can read peoples thoughts and know when they're lying. I also have other super powers, drive a rolls-royce and can speak 27 languages. Honest!

[ummmm]

Wouldn't put up with it. The only lies I find acceptable are the 'does my bum look big in this' kind of lies.

Although my partner would say yes if it did.

Lies just lead to insecurity. I don't tell lies....I do omit the truth though.

[naomi24]

I agree with Sara. You can never trust a liar.

[tamborine]

Depends....my OH always fibbed on his movements; and I fibbed with my costs. Learn the game ;)

[ummmm]

Fibs Tambo....

[kikadoo]

Can i borrow your rolls Rev Sermon? I can deliver back to you on my private yacht! :D

I know what you mean guys, one lie is too much. I think I am falling for the "but i love him too much to let one lie come between us". That sounds terrible really, especially since there has been about 2398 lies. Lol.

I am left a little paranoid, is he or isn't he etc. What bugs me most are the lies about something sooooo trivial such as what time he woke up. I mean come on! To be honest, i couldn't really give a damn what time he wakes up but why the need to lie?

and sara3, I have no idea why he is lying to me. We were always open. I encourage him to be open with me. But it just felt like, one day he told a lie and now he's hooked.

I just find it hard to understand any of it. And he knows how serious I am taking it yet it continues.

Shall I get rid? Or shant I? Who knows....

[kikadoo]

I agree with you ummmm, omiting the truth to 'does my bum look big' is no problem. Although my bum always looks big so I don't need anyone to tell me! Lol.

Tambo, I think i'm gonna take a leaf out of your book ;)

[ummmm]

You choose....

[sara3]

no one can decide for you, but if he is a habitual liar he probably needs some real help. if he's prepared to see a professional about it, maybe it's worth waiting to see what happens.

[Sqad]

sara 3,cherrychapstick,ummmm,naomi

Just to clear my mind.....are you saying that you have NEVER lied?

[tamborine]

good kikadoo....we had 3 kids & 40th anniv before I lost him ;(

Enjoy yourself for yourself and he'll wonder Y you're not curious of his activities; that's when you learn to fib (not lie) to your own advantage.

[Polly1958]

Get rid of him kikadoo,I was married to a compulsive liar,and he's still the same.He will not change and he'll make your life a misery.x

[sara3]

Sqad, in my world there is a vast difference between a little fib, and constantly lying to your partner.

[ummmm]

Like I said Sqad.....does my bum look big in this....kind of lies. As Tambo says...Fibs.

I have nothing to lie about Sqad.

[Sqad]

Hardly the point, the question started about "infidelity" and had been altered to "telling untruths" to which you have all responded.
So....are you saying that you have NEVER told untruths?

[sara3]

can you not see the title of the question?

[ummmm]

Not to Ginger....NO I haven't. Other people I have....but that's more of a case of them saying 'don't tell him/her I told you'

[ummmm]

Lol Sara....

Put your glasses on Sqad :-) x