Mustn't Kiss The Grannies Or Grandads - Unbelievable!

[carolegif]

The Mail Online (can't do links, sorry), has an article where a Miss (says it all!) Lucy Emmerson has advised parents not to kiss their grandparents as they will be prone to sexual abuse! They should wave or 'high 5' them instead!
You couldn't make it up!

[anotheoldgit]

pixie373

/// Ps. I dislike that "modern parenting" comment. If the previous generation were such fantastic parents, how come they haven't managed to teach it to their children? ///

Aren't you over generalising?

[pixie373]

My sister isn't with him now, so has no problems with him. Their daughter adores her dad, but doesn't always want to kiss him on demand.

[woofgang]

oh and you NEVER do that do you?

[Mamyalynne]

The only kisses and cuddles I get from my Grandchildren are freely given and unprompted - it can get a bit like a tag wrestling bout when they all join in together though.

I would never sulk if they simply waved bye and did not kiss.

[woofgang]

sorry, last remark aimed at AOG. Pixie i agree, blackmailing children like that is stupid and despicable.

[pixie373]

No, aog. I think the comment about "modern parenting" was over-generalising. Where do we learn our parenting skills from?

[vulcan42]

On the other hand I've heard parents tell their children to "kiss granny/grandad" without doing it themselves. If they kissed their parents first wouldn't the children see it as a natural thing and not have to be told?

[pixie373]

Lol, woofgang- no, i don't kiss him on demand, either:-)

[Mosaic]

I listened to the Radio 4 interview on the morning news programme, and I agree with what the representative was saying, namely that children should learn early on that they do not have to allow people to touch them if they didn't want, whether they were family members or not.

As a child I hated being swooped on and picked up, and I still will not kiss people 'on demand' which has unfortunately caused friction within the family. But it's my body, my choice. When my own kids were small the notion was new that a child shouldn't sit on a stranger's knee (ie Santa in the days before safeguarding legislation) - I always told my children they didn't have to if they didn't want.
Carole, I am interested in the tone of your post 'A miss Lucy Emmerson' - why is this of note? Are you / the newspaper in question suggesting that this choice of salutation makes her less informed, or that it is a source of ridicule? I'm genuinely curious in this choice of language on your part.

[anotheoldgit]

Chewn

*** Yes they were good, we never had to address these kind of problems way back then.***

/// So you admit it was a problem but it was never addressed . I tend to stand up and address problems, not ignore them. ///

Where have I admitted that?

No there were no such problems to address back then, but by the very fact of this report and the following debate, there obviously are such problems now.

[Mosaic]

AOG: the sexual abuse of children has sadly been a long standing problem. Only with acknowledgement and openness can the matter be quantified, so you and I are not not placed to say 'this wasn't a problem back then'.

[pixie373]

Which problems are you denying existed, aog? Yewtree spring to mind at any point?

[andres]

What a load if rubbish!!!. Why does every action,deed or word have to be regarded as sexual. The bond between most grandparents and their grandchildren is special and shouldn't be sullied .What is nicer than two little arms wrapped round your neck and a little voice whispering --'love you,gran'. Precious times to be treasured. When they get older some grandchildren will still want a hug and a kiss. Others will not. That's fine by me .I will always be there for my grandchildren no matter what

[Gromit]

AOG

// Yes they were good, we never had to address these kind of problems way back then. //

Good? Incest and child abuse did not start in 1998. In was going on in the 50s and 60s. The fact that no one addressed the problem then is not good, it is bad.

[anotheoldgit]

pixie373

/// No, aog. I think the comment about "modern parenting" was over-generalising. Where do we learn our parenting skills from? ///

Good parents teach their children many skills, be them social skills or others only hoping that in their future life some of these skills will 'catch on', but they cannot be held responsible for how their children conduct themselves when they mature.

What with modern media pressure put on them by what they read in magazines, see on TV etc, and what is conveyed to them by certain academics in later years, we now arrive at some of the young's problems of today.

[anotheoldgit]

Mosaic

/// AOG: the sexual abuse of children has sadly been a long standing problem. Only with acknowledgement and openness can the matter be quantified, so you and I are not not placed to say 'this wasn't a problem back then'. ///

I did not say that sexual abuse of children was only a modern problem.

What we are discussing however, is that there seems to be a problem with today's children kissing their Grandparents.

[pixie373]

Yes, i agree there are other influences, but i definitely have learnt the most from my mum. Although i didn't appreciate it really, until i had children.
There does seem to be a bit of confusion about the"halcyon" days though. Some say they were free to be out all day, parents didn't know where they were or what they were doing. They traipsed in when it got dark. Then others say it's children nowadays that can do "whatever they want". I don't think so.