A lot of this is ridiculous semantics.
Leaving aside the ludicrous EEA concept, non-members of the EU do not contribute towards its budget; they do not belong to either the single market or the customs union; they do not accept freedom of movement; they do not submit to rulings by the European Court of Justice; they do not have laws foisted upon them which are made by unelected foreign civil servants.
These “negotiations” (if they can be worthy of that term) are simply about retaining some or all of the above (and more besides) in one form or another. The referendum result (please don’t come in with “four-fifths of five-eighths of F-all”, Eddie) determined that the UK would leave the EU. That means ditching all of the above and a lot more besides. The strategy to achieve this is straightforward and is currently being debated in Parliament.
Other nations have trading relationships with the EU either via formal trading agreements or simply by trade happening. None seems to suffer the kind of perils currently being portrayed by “Project Fear Part Two”.
The EEA is a ridiculous concept because it confers on the non-EU members (Iceland, Lichtenstein and Norway) almost all the responsibilities of being an EU member whilst having none of the (very limited) influence that individual nations have on its policies and procedures. The position of the three non-EU EEA members is interesting. Norway’s politicians hankered after EU (then EEC) membership along with the UK in the 1960s. They were finally accepted but, despite an overwhelming parliamentary majority in favourp, the proposal was defeated in a referendum in 1972. A simple trade agreement with the EU followed and that remained until Norway joined the EEA in 1994. Iceland applied to join the EU in 2010 but withdrew its application in 2015. There is little doubt that the principle opposition to EU membership is that of the Common Fisheries Policy (which does not apply to the EEA). Liechtenstein has no aspirations to join the EU. With a GDP per head of around three times that of the UK it probably has no wish to be told that it must share that wealth with Poland, Bulgaria and Romania.
The notion that our EU conditions of membership might be tightened if we had voted to remain are fanciful. Whilst I would not trust the EU to stick to its word, the UK has permanent opt outs from Schengen and the euro and they seem, for the moment anyway until the foolish electorates come to their senses, to have eased their quest for "ever closer union". Nobody suggested that those opt-outs would rescinded during the campaign in the same way that nobody suggested we would remain part of the single market or the customs union.
The vote to leave the EU meant that the UK should be rid of each and every pernicious influence wielded by the EU over UK affairs. There is no halfway house. You are either in or you are out. To my mind EEA members are simply EU members by another name.