And There's More

[Rondy]

I woke up this morning to the sun coming through my bedroom window.
I need to have a word with that new paper boy.

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A father came home from a long business trip to find his son riding a very fancy new 10 speed bike. "Where did you get the money for the bike? It must have cost £300."
"Easy, Dad," the boy replied. "I earned it hiking."
"Come on," the father said. "Tell me the truth."
"That is the truth," the boy replied. "Every night you were gone, Mr. Reynolds from the grocery store would come over to see Mum. He'd give me a £20 note and tell me to take a hike!"

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A football coach was asked about his star linesman.
The coach replied, "He doesn't know the meaning of the word fear. In fact, I have seen his application and there are a lot of words he doesn't know the meaning of!"

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Two old ladies, Dolly and Ruby were chatting about their grandchildren.
Dolly said: "Each year I send him a generous cheque on his birthday and he never replies, not even a thank you message."
Ruby replies;" I do the same every year, send off a cheque for a good amount
and I hear from him within a few days of him receiving it, In fact he calls around to see me."
"Wow!! How come?" Replies Dolly."
"Simple, I never sign the cheque."

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I've started a business building boats in my attic.
Sails are going through the roof.

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So a female employee got an expensive pen as a birthday gift from her boss. She sent him a 'Thank you note' by email:
Boss’s wife read the email and filed for divorce.
The email said: Your penis wonderful and I enjoyed using it last night. It has extra ordinary smooth flow and a firm stroke. I loved its perfect size and grip. Felt like I was in heaven when using it.Thanks a lot.!
Moral: A "space" is an vital part of English grammar!

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"Dad, I want to become a politician," said Jim.
His father asked, "And what are you doing to become one?"
"Nothing, dad."
"Good, you're halfway there then."

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Little Benny and his daddy were standing in front of the lion's cage at the zoo.
Benny's father was explaining how ferocious and strong lions are, and Benny was taking it all in with a serious expression.
"Daddy," Benny said finally, "if the lion got out of his cage and ate you up..."
"Yes, son?" Benny's father said expectantly.
Benny continued, "What bus should I take home?"

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[Hazlinny]

Funny 🤣

[zebo]

When Pen Island started operating on line they quickly changed their email address.