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How much more sympathy can you have

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Snafu03 | 21:06 Sun 21st Nov 2010 | News
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for YET ANOTHER of these cases? Another case of a mother who's hads enough of the role.

http://uk.news.yahoo....at-named-6323e80.html
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As much as needed - for everyone involved.

To say that the mother has "had enough of the role" is to vastly oversimplify post-natal depression - almost certainly the cause of this tragedy.

No mother kills her baby because she has "had enough of the role" - she does it because she is of unsound mind which can be caused by a combintion of factors, but being fed up is never one of them.

I think it is a terrible situation for everyone concerned, and our sympathy, which is free for us, should be given easily and with due compassion.

You never know how you would feel in that situation ... or what you might do ..
I agree with andy-hughes - a hideous situation but a mother of unsound mind, not just a callous act by the sound of it.
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aren't alot of murder cases 'over simplified' without the causes and emotions often over-looked in lieu of the act itself.

I'm implying that 'mother kills child' murder cases are given special considerations in court that other murder cases aren't.

Dimished responsibilites and 'mental health' issues seem to carry alot more weight in these circumstances.

I'm sure most hardened gangsters can make claims to persuade a jury they're 'unhinged' and not responsible for their actions. If successful they face a life sentence in Parkhurst or Broadmoor.
Thank goodness the judicial system has female representation. Men (or you snafu) just dont understand the trauma of some young lone mothers trying to care/placate a screaming baby.
Quite so, jaydah.

And that’s why, generally speaking, it is best to have two parents to share the upbringing of a child.

Unfortunately in recent years the fashion and active encouragement of single parenthood has somewhat overlooked this desirability. The main reason cited for this is so that no judgement is passed on anybody’s lifestyle choice.

Alas, in cases such as these judgement will have to be passed, but for an altogether different reason.
No snafu03, they are not 'over-simplified' and no-one would seriously try to diminsih the tragedy and seriousness of teh taking of a life.

But over-simplification is the road to knee-jerk reactions, and before we know it, we have a system where people are judged on their ethnicity, or ecconomic status.

Which brings me to New Judge's point - where you appear to be lamenting the fact that people's 'lifestyle choice' is not a cornerstone of the legal system,a although i cannot for the life of me understand why any young woman would take the stress and strain of single motherhood as a 'liffestyle choice'.

It is easy to take the moral high ground from our position - by definition of our discussion here, we have access to a computer, and the education in basic literacy to be able to use it, and a degree of detached logic that enables us to discuss a situation whcih we are highly unlikely to experience first hand.

It is our moral responsibility to look at circumstances and wuider pictures that affect members of our society who do not have our fortunate circumstances, and to extend a degree of understanding and compassion to them, while still ensuring that appropriate legal action is taken.

To simply glibly dismiss this poor woman and others like her as failing to cope with her lifestyle choice is a callous and hopefully minority view.

Perish the thought that anyone should be judged for a lack of empathy.
I don't know that having your boyfriend walk out on you after having a child is a 'lifestyle choice'. I have no idea if that's what happened in this case, but it happens lots (a friend of mine is going through it now).
Yes that does happen to a lot of young women, jno. Whether or not they had taken the time and trouble to establish that the relationship they were in and the man involved were likely to stand the test of time is another question. I have to say that some examples among young women that I have come into contact with might suggest otherwise. In addition, for all those who have somehow lost the company and support of the child’s father there are at least an equal number who had no intention of having the father involved from the outset.

Women in both these categories have to a greater or lesser degree taken a choice which turns out to have a major effect on their lifestyle for many years to come. We do not know, of course, whether the young woman in question fell into either of these categories, but in any case the outcome was tragic.
Again New Judge, you appear to pre-suppose that young women entering into parenthood have the wherewithall to take a look ahead and see if the father is likely to be around.

A lot simply don't.

They lack the intelligence or maturity to formulate a plan for their lives.

These are people who do not make things happen - things just happen to them.

And again, they deserve our compassion and support, rather than our tutting and eye-raising becausr they didn;t happen to live their lives the way some people think they should.

No-one is waiting at the end with a gold medal for anyone who made a success of their life on any level, and no-one is waiting with a dunce's cap for those who made bad decisions.

But the bit ibefore that - which we call life, is our chance to appreciate our fortune, and give some help and support to those who didn;t manage their path as well as we did.

Moral superiority is an ugly character trait.
NJ, if you know of some foolproof way to tell if a relationship will last, write a book and get rich! The world has long wanted such a thing (and, I quite agree, needs it).
I have no sympathy for any parent, or anyone who kills a child. There's always a way out if one is unable to cope...
oooh society I hope you never get to the end of your resources with no one around who gives a damn
But society...they need to KNOW there is a way out...too many don't and have no-one (in their mind at least) that they can turn to.
This is not someone who deliberately and cunningly planned a murder....it's someone who was tipped over the edge(of reason)...and quite violently,at that.
There no amount of hardship that could cause me to kill a child.
The killer of this child is a murderer and should be held accountable for committing murder.
society...you/none of us, can judge until you are in the other persons shoes...which you are not.
You are quite right Andy. Few of us are blessed with the ability to make the right choices throughout our life. That is why over the years a framework of “best practice” has been developed which helps us make the right choices (or at least lessens the chances of us making too many wrong ones). It’s called experience and it is passed on through the generation, with each new generation hopefully avoiding some of the mistakes their predecessors made. Until comparatively recently, that is.

In not much more than a generation all this has been thrown out of the window. This “best practice” guidance (and the issue we’re talking about here is but one of many topics covered) has been seen as prescribing the way people live and is to be stamped out. Essentially people have been told that they should do their own thing and that they can ignore all the experience gained by our ancestors which has led to the development of the framework of best practice. Of course, you cannot compel people to live their lives in a particular way, but you can discourage them from doing so by not making so attractive inappropriate choices which experience has shown may lead to problems.

Single parenthood was not frowned upon in the past just to demonstrate some sort of moral superiority. Almost every measurement taken suggests that it is not, generally speaking, the best framework in which to raise children. Of course, sometimes it cannot be avoided, but it should not be actively encouraged as it is now. The result is more and more tragedies like the one which started this question.
NJ....I got pregnant at 18. I don't think it would have made a difference if he stuck around or not. He did....but he lives in a different country. He's alway been a great Dad though.

Society....I worked in a psychiatric hospital for years. Cases like this are not about 'coping' there tends to be a deep set psychiatric problem. I would give as much sympathy to the Mother as I possible could. No one would want a child to suffer, especially the Mother of that child, she needs help. The day it dawns on her what she's actually done is going to be a very sad day indeed.
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Actually NJ...I agree with you. Some single parents are great...some need support.

I remember the days of colic....having no one to hand the baby to at the end of the day is enough to drive you mental.

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