HAVE YOU EVER BEEN.....

[Slapshot]

.........GUILTY OF LOOKING AT OTHERS YOUR OWN AGE AND THINKING, SURELY I CAN'T LOOK THAT OLD.

WELL . . .
YOU'LL LOVE THIS ONE.


MY NAME IS ALICE,
AND I WAS SITTING IN THE WAITING ROOM FOR MY FIRST APPOINTMENT WITH A NEW DENTIST.


I NOTICED HIS DDS DIPLOMA ON THE WALL, WHICH BORE HIS FULL NAME.
SUDDENLY,
I REMEMBERED A TALL, HANDSOME, DARK-HAIRED BOY WITH THE SAME NAME HAD BEEN IN MY HIGH SCHOOL CLASS SOME 40-ODD YEARS AGO.


COULD HE BE THE SAME GUY THAT I HAD A SECRET CRUSH ON, WAY BACK THEN?


UPON SEEING HIM, HOWEVER,
I QUICKLY DISCARDED ANY SUCH THOUGHT.


THIS BALDING, GRAY-HAIRED MAN WITH THE DEEPLY LINED FACE WAS WAY TOO OLD
TO HAVE BEEN MY CLASSMATE.


AFTER HE EXAMINED MY TEETH, I ASKED HIM IF HE HAD ATTENDED MORGAN PARK
HIGH SCHOOL .


'YES. YES, I DID.
I'M A MUSTANG,'
HE GLEAMED WITH PRIDE.


WHEN DID YOU GRADUATE?'
I ASKED.


HE ANSWERED,
'IN 1974.
WHY DO YOU ASK?'


YOU WERE IN MY CLASS!',
I EXCLAIMED.


HE LOOKED AT ME CLOSELY.


THEN, THAT UGLY,



OLD,



BALD,



WRINKLED FACED,



FAT-ASSED,



GRAY-HAIRED,



DECREPIT



SON-OF-A-BITCH



ASKED,




'WHAT DID YOU TEACH???

[Craftypig]

Killer......!! Nothing like a good laugh to start the day!!!