Old age approaching, would you rather lose your mind or your body?

[RATTER15]

Im talking "Senile Dementia" not other kinds of brain damage.

With old age approaching, if you had a choice, do you think you would rather hold on to your sanity or you physical abilities.

As some of you know I work in a severe Dementia unit.

Personally I think I would hold on to my body. Whilst the early stages of dementia can be frightening, frustrating and very upsetting for all concerned, as it progresses and you no longer are aware of your illness it is not such a problem for the sufferer but would be still very upsetting for their loved ones. I dont think I would want to live if I was unable to move around, walk out into my garden, go shopping etc and end up spending my life in a wheel chair.

Im basing my views on the Dementia sufferers I work with, they are generally speaking very happy people, they are still communicating their wishes (generally speaking) not always verbally but you get to know the individual and what they are communicating. My work is a very happy place and all the staff and residents are mostly enjoying everyday as it comes. I accept that this is not always the case, we have one or two very sad cases where their life is a turmoil but this can usually be controlled with medication if required.

What are your thoughts?

[woofgang]

Some folk with dementia aren't so happy, they stick at permanently distressed or violent or both. I have had experience of these poor folk and its not nice.

[Bbbananas]

Am really not sure to be honest. I suppose it depends on the degree of any physical disability. I would absolutely hate to be blind.

[LoftyLottie]

My mother became physically very disabled and also suffered from vascular dementia. She knew her mind was going and that upset her more than any of her physical disabilities.

Unfortunately, arthritis runs in our family and wheelchairs become necessary. I am much more frightened of losing my mind than I am losing the use of my legs. Life can still be good for wheelchair bound people - many of them are young anyway.

[RATTER15]

I agree woofgang, I think I covered that situation as well, these are unfortunate cases that I often deal with but like I said in the right setting this can usually be controlled to quite a large degree.

[LoftyLottie]

Agree with Woofie. A lot of folk with dementia are not happy at all and distress can be a symptom of dementia.

[ummmm]

My nan seemed to skip the frightening stage of dementia. Or she just hid it well. Through it all she has never lost her ability to laugh. I think she gets a little confused with her aches and pains because she thinks she 40 (she's 80). It's very saddening for us....but she's happy. She likes her home, the staff are great, and she gets taken out often.

I find it even more saddening that when we go to pick her up and sign the visitors book, beside doctors and nurses etc, it seems to be just our family in the book. So many of the other residents rarely get visitors. That truly is sad :-(

Grandad has limited mobility but a sharp mind.

I would prefer to be like my nan.

[mike11111]

No contest in my case, the mind. What is the point of a body without one. Although I probably won't achieve it I would like to die around my hundredth birthday, just after putting the last answer into the Mephisto crossword and finishing off a large double gin, no matter how bedridden I may be.

[dr b]

As a lifelong athlete the thought of having a perfectly sound mind in a failing body is not a pleasant one. My dad is currently going through this - Parkinson's, arthritic back - and it is not fun to watch. On the other hand, my mom died of a brain tumor that robbed her of her mental faculties for her last months - not fun either. Can I just get hit by a bus when I'm 83?

[Robinia]

I don't honestly know...I watched as my brother, a very fit, young in mind, man, gradually deteriorate over 15 years with Parkinson's until he couldn't do anything apart from drink through a straw. Lost him two years ago at 65ys old & I'm still angry he had to go through that, it was heartbreaking. If I thought that was my fate too I'd want out before the worst developed.

[mike11111]

Forgot to mention one thing. My father died at the age of 61 (nothing to do with dementia). When I picked up his effects from the hospital there was a packet of cigarettes freshly opened with only one having been smoked. For some reason I found this incredibly sad. The packet will have to be empty before I go. And yes, after a week I plucked up the courage to finish the packet off for him.

[LoftyLottie]

I have sort of accepted that there is every likelihood I might be wheelchair bound as the years progress. Life is not worth living, in my opinion, if my brain ceases to function properly.

Quite honestly, I think that life ceases to be worthwhile when you are of no use to anybody, including yourself.

[rowanwitch]

If I'd outlived my family which is likely to be the case dementia would be better as there would be no one to mourn the person I once was...

[RATTER15]

Mike....

>>>>>No contest in my case, the mind. What is the point of a body without one<<<

The points are many, like I said, most of the people I work with have no idea they have a dementia, they are fit and able (talking their age into account) and lead happy busy lives. "In their minds" their mothers and fathers are still alive, they still look after their children on a daily basis, they still go to work everyday they still laugh and joke and act the fool, It is their mind, but this also keeps their minds happy and active.

[ummmm]

My nan has a good quality of life. She just doesn't remember...

[ummmm]

People with dementia can still think.

[ChuckFickens]

I'm worried about losing either, I like being active in both brain and body. but if pushed I guess it would be mind for the reasons already said, I'd rather think I was OK and be able to move about than not be able to move about and know I've got a problem.

Although dr b's idea appeals too (although I wouldn't wish that stress on a bus driver.... I might take up bungee jumping at about 80:))

[mike11111]

I suppose the most distressing part is the onset of dementia when the patient knows something is not quite right. Ever since my late 40s I have occasionally found myself doing odd silly little things, like putting the toilet rolls in the fridge and a bottle of milk on the bathroom windowsill. At the moment I can still laugh about it, but for how long?

[ummmm]

Mike....I've been doing that all my life.

[ChuckFickens]

Mike, I've done that sort of stuff for as long as I can remember!